Search Results: fear of commitment

I think I have a fear of commitment or something like that.

For example, I really don't want to have a relationship. I just want to say that I have a partner, know what I mean?

I've always had crushes on guys and would sleep with a few guys (just cuddling, no sex). I would like to have the company of a guy to get the benefit (of kissing, cuddling and maybe closeness), but don't really want a relationship. I want a "brother" type relationship but I don't seem to be able to create that with any guys. They usually just want it all (have sex with me, etc) or none. Like I can't seem to change this "mentality". I am in a relationship now (finally, after years of dating etc). We've been together for 1 year and I'm like getting freaked out that we're becoming too close. I wish for us to separate but still be together. How do I do that? He does not wish to do this. The more closer we become the harder I push him away, and the more mean things I do so that he'll let me go. I don't mean to hurt him but I have to push away because of fear of losing myself and commitment to one person in such an intimate way (he's the only guy I've had sex with at the age of 24-25). This is like too much for me and I just want to be alone and wish I didn't know him so much. Is this really weird or is it just me? Do other people have fear of commitment this way? Or am I the only one? Thanks for helping me!