Search Results: fear of commitment

I’ve come to you guys because I'm super worried if this is insane or not

First off: Would you think its was crazy and stupid if a friend or family member told you they had been communicating with a person for 13 months and really think they are in love with them and will soon go meet the person?

Second: Do you think its all possible to be in love with someone you've never met face to face?

back story

I became member of this site a little over a year ago About a month after I joined I started corresponding with a man that had answered a few of my questions the first day we emailed back and forth for 6 hr Now I'm not usually a very talkative person and I don't open up to a lot of people because of growing up in foster care but I found him to be the easiest person to talk to and was very comfortable/able to open up to him almost immediately We began to email back and forth for hours every day most times staying up until dawn talking to each other about every topic you can think of After 2 mos of emailing we began to call each other and we both admitted that we were really starting to like each other as more then friends We continued to call each other every day and night spending 6-7 hrs on the phone just talking sharing our past/present lives and plans for the future I could talk to him about anything we talked politics sports music serious stuff past relationship and many other things We eventually decided to consider ourselves a couple and make serious plans to meet, 8 mos in he starts to talk about marriage and a serious life together and me moving to his state I found out then that I have an absolutely huge fear of commitment and change I found myself finding every little reason that it was not possible to be in love with him and that I was stupid and an idiot for even thinking of flying to meet a man that I had met online so I broke up with him saying some very mean and nasty things

A month or so later I feel the depression I faced in my teen years return and I sink lower and lower, I pick up an old habit of smoking weed to deal with the depression Flash forward, December when I take a look at my past year and I decide to start fixing things that are wrong in my life and I realize that I blamed him for every problem with us that I had made up to cover my real problems so I write a super long apology letter and he responds to it xmas day We begin to talk again like we used to and not a month later my feelings 4 him are back and stronger than ever You know how they say that a person will know when they find the ONE well I really think he is my ONE I have been happier in a few weeks then I have in mos I smile at the idea of one day marrying him instead of running in fear I want to tell my family about him and the fact that I do plan on meeting him soon whether its him flying to me or me going to him I'm very worried that they are going to think I am nuts and not accept the idea I just want to be with him, and have my family be ok with it