Search Results: lying about flirting

I was ecstatic when I became friends with a stud of our school, litteraly like my manna from heaven... he even took me out a couple of times, though he never expressed any feelings until after some months he started to really compliment and flirt and take an open interest in me. They were the best days of my life and he was, is, perfect, he is charming, confident, sexy, good looking, just everything... until I asked him out, i just didn't want to let whatever this feeling was between us, go. He rejected, saying he doesn't do dates anymore, so I settled on friends with benefits ( yeah I was that crazy for him) we just went to second base and it was so passion filled I miss it till date. One month later he left me for a bestie of his who recently broke up with her bf, i was crushed and we had a fight over something else also and we didn't text for a month. then suddenly he did and I knew why- his bestie dumped him two times and he was seeking solace and I was such a pathetic despo I went, I even hinted if he wanted to be friends with benefits I was ready...( yeah it was THAT good) but he was still hung on her and then I even dated an enemy of him to make him jealous but he doesn't budge. Now I have left dating and all for a while because I have to get into a new school and prepare for exams and dont want any distractions... I would be lying if I am over him completely. I don't know if I ever loved him, I think more of, infatuated coz he is a stud and all but yes some very real feelings were also involved. Everything reminds me of him, no matter how many times I think of something that happened between us, I smile, when I see him I still smile like an idiot, my bestie complains I talk about him all the time and sometimes I think we could have had it all, we would have been happy, and what went wrong. I hope in my new school (if I get in) I will get another better person but till then... what to do? Love is so beautifull but why does it make you so emotional?