Search Results: i dont show i care for her

Me and my boyfriend been together for around 7 months now. I have been hurt before by my ex and this created trust issues. I have been guarded up for first few months during our relationship but I have been opening up to him more. Yes we have been intimate for these past 2 months and it is going well. But I do have some doubts though I dont know if its just my insecurities taking over. I have been thinking about the following:
- he is quite fit and likes to take care of himself. I have let myself go for this past year so not motivated to go back to the gym. He has told me to come gym with him so now I feel insecure and thought about how maybe he wants a fit and better looking girl than me. I have told him this but he said "I want you to look after yourself but I still want to be with you" but I keep thinking Im not good enough for him and that he can find a better looking girl than me.
- Im not sure if its because of my birth control pills but I have been very moody at the moment and been quite depressed, keep thinking about how my life is unstable at the moment. Also, I keep thinking maybe Im not emotionally stable for a relationship. I do care and have strong feelings for my boyfriend but I kind of hate myself and I dont know if I can ever love someone if I dont love myself? Sometimes I doubt him when he says "i love you so much" but he has shown through his actions and efforts that he does care for me. When we had a massive argument, I was at a breaking point where I wanted to leave but he did fight for our relationship. I tend to give up on people easily and I know its not a good thing.
So I am confused. I dont know whether if these are good enough reasons to break up? Or maybe its just my insecurities? I care about him so much and I just don't want to hurt the both of us.

I have no problem with that lifestyle but I often feel sorry for those people involved because there is no love or attraction usually.

In in a relationship I always favour personality; honesty, respect, caring, funny, positive, understanding, empathetic, common interests.

I know there is some rich guys and young girls out there who do actually love one another and also enjoy the novelty of "gold digger" type relationships but I was watching that millionaire matchmaker show and it's just so sad that all the girls care about is money and all the guys care about is a hot girl to use as an accessory.

Surely these people get sad or lonely? If your only with a man for money and NOTHING else do you not feel like your missing out on the genuine love and respect that comes with a true relationship?

Dont get me wrong I like a boy who at least works a part time job I would never go for anyone who has no ambition and doesn't contribute to society but it's definitely not a must for them to be rich af.

I know a girl at my work who is a gold digger and she's such a lovely woman who's so pretty and talented but her man is always nasty to her, she tells us all the stories and they argue constantly and she complains about him all the time yet she still is with him... for money !!!

I know I would feel lonely in that relationship, no shade thrown to anyone who is in a relationship like that, all my respect is given :)

any opinions?