Search Results: confused by a crush

It's complicated.
Although I have had several relationships, I have never really liked anybody so far. The reason why I said yes was to appear cool and to not feel lonely.
Until I saw this guy and was totally struck. I really don't know why did he struck me, for he wasn't that good looking nor outstanding. But anyways, I think I found the first boy i've ever liked. I started talking to him but I was disappointed that he doesn't keep the convo going. So I told myself to never text him again if he doesn't text me back. And he didn't, therefore I just left the thing and tried to move on.
All was going well until he started following mine another social media. We haven't been talking for weeks! I was quite confused by this action, and I think that I'm probably over thinking. Anyways, I texted him again but he still appeared to be quite cold.
We are geographically separated and I haven't found enough common interest yet. I think we need to talk more and perhaps meet up.
So, after all those attempts, I decided to move on and forget about him. This is when I meet my current boyfriend. When he asked me out, I didn't even hesitate, because I think dating would help me forget. As soon as we started to date, I tried my best to act as a happy girlfriend in front of him and all my friends. But deep inside my heart I know that I have never liked my current boyfriend and I found myself still caring about my crush.
I kept over thinking those days. Sometimes I try to convince myself that I actually don't like my crush, and the only reason why i'm still interested is that I'm just curious because I can never get him. But while all those attempts added to the confusion, one thing I can be sure of. That is, I do not like my boyfriend, although he's nice to me and he's athletic and smart and outgoing.