Search Results: turning him down

When I was in college I struggled financially just to stay in school and living expenses, since I was paying for everything. Then I came down with a medical condition, which added to it. It definitely made me stronger, but I felt like I lost out on some good opportunities. However, things are turning around.

So, would you rather go through your hardships early in life, and get it over with? Or would you rather have to deal with your hardships later on in life, and enjoy your youth?

It is twelve o'two, I get dressed & make my way to get a cup of coffee

A glass mug getting its fill, I notice the plastic throwaways, the lids & cups are next to each other on the shelf

I step into the kitchen to take stock of anything to eat,

I stand still & stare into half an empty sink

next to me he says “what’s wrong with you?

your mother thinks you’re depressed”

I go grab to grab my cup & leave

“You don’t know how lucky you are

you’re white

you’re a man

you live in America, in one of the most affluent states”

“My god, dad”

the atheist then left that room to drink his coffee elsewhere,

the cable box is stuck, frozen up upon entry

but that was for the best

Turning on some truth from mytube I quickly notice thereafter

a truth more pressing,

it is twelve-eleven

Back to the machine to make a coffee for class, soon

The specious truth of the lid & the cup are a lie

it’s huge & needing to be bent on

“Who put these lids & cups together?”

“I did, they were right beside each other…”

From another room I swap the stack of lids with the right ones

“…so they must have been separated”

I forego the bag, not needing it today

I pull out of the driveway with the drink besides me & stare blankly up the street ahead into a future

as one would down the barrel of a gun

The vaporizer quickly ran out of charge on the way

leaving me with only the clouds above to look up to as I pulled into a busy & hurried campus

In the knick of time I arrive as class commenced

but it didn’t matter

Math had some hurdles, but some victories, didn’t need to say a word to anyone

in fact

it went well enough but for one thing,

I had forgotten the damn drink

People left early & so did I,

it was warm enough to stomach

which I did before pulling out of the parking lot & heading back towards that house

white enough to smile at passing cop cars

male enough to jerk myself off at the intersections

American enough to salute the hanging flags on the streets

& aff