Search Results: stuck on ex

Names have been changed to protect identities :)
My future last name shall be Smith for the purpose of this question.

I was over at my fiance's parents' house. They had a few people over and we were having some after-dinner wine. I'm not a super huge drinker but an occasional glass of wine is whatever. Anyway, so we're all gathered around and they asked if I wanted to try the new bottle. They offered me a sip of the glass they'd just poured.

The glass was going to go to one of the other ladies (this lady happened to be my fiance's ex girlfriend). I asked her if it was okay if I took a sip out of her glass. Before she could answer, my future father in law said, ""Jane's" a part of the family. She's a "Smith." She knows how we work! It's fine!"

So this was hurtful for a few reasons.

1. "Jane" and my fiance "dated" for 7 months back when they were 12 (10 years ago).
2. "Jane" and my fiance haven't hung out together in years. She left their friend group (of her own accord) shortly after their little relationship of sorts ended.
3. I have been with my fiance for 7 years and we have been engaged for 2 years. Whenever anyone mentions me as being a part of their family, his parents immediately jump in and specify that I'm absolutely not a part of their family.

So... it's just irritating and hurtful that they'd refer to this girl as a part of the family but not me? I realize I should probably just brush it off but it still stings. Doesn't make me super excited to marry into their family, tbh. Love their son, but I don't feel welcomed. They treat me like a member of their family but if ever they need to tell people what I am to them they make it very clear that I am not. They only started mentioning me as more than their son's friend a couple months ago.

And before you ask, yes, my fiance argues on my behalf and yes, he sticks up for me and sides with me.

I liked this guy but it turns out he was shallow, fake and annoying. He had been gossiping about me with his ex, when I found out I first confronted him until she started butting in. Then I told her to fuck off. I barely knew this girl but she tried to come at me for being black. She started tanning, trying to stick out her butt, etc. I paid her no kind, so she started trying to gossip about me so I blocked her ass and him.
I never really met his friends but they assumed I was jealous, fat and ugly because I dont have any photos of me online. I got really sick of her coming at me sideways. She was all like im a model, blonde and blue eyes. I was like so? Im curvy, I have big beautiful curly hair and im nice. She took me saying im curvy as being fat.
Im actually naturally small and petite, but also fit. I work out and eat healthy. She looks like the typical starving, blonde makeup caked model. I dont need to be jealous of a girl built like boy. I have a nice flat stomach, abs, an ass and boobs.
I found out him and his friends do drugs and it became too toxic for me. I live around lots of white people. Lots of white blonde women are the standard of beauty. I didn't care until she tried bullying me. The same girl who said I was hating on her for being white tans her skin until it's orange and wears box braids in her hair. I dont wear weave or do anything to my skin. I dont do anything period that resembles a white girl and I dont look like one. She pissed me off bad.