Thanks for being honest with me I have not cheated physically. But I know deep down inside it's not right. These man know I am married and don't care but I should know better. About telling my husband I couldn't he will kill me seriously. I would have to live with that guilt for the rest of my life. In my culture a women that cheats in any way will be physically hurt by her husband. He will also kick her out the house and he will shame her in front of everyone. I am ashame of what I have done.
Your welcome. If you know it isn't right, stop now. No one can live with a guilty conscience. The sad truth is most guys wouldn't care you're married and would gladly engage in those activities with you, and would be wrong for doing so I might add, but you swore a vow to your husband. You must do right by him. Do these men know your husband or anyone else you associate with? If so now you risk them telling your husband or someone else in your social circle. I don't know that I can condone physical violence that isn't in self defense or war, so pardon me if I'm wrong for saying this but, maybe a cheating wife deserves a good slap across the mouth. Aside from murdering him, there's no greater act of betrayal. Certainly a cheating wife deserves to be kicked out. I would say this all equally applies to a cheating husband too. Point is your conscience bothers you and you know it's wrong so just stop.
My religion the husband can have more then one woman. But he just won't smack me in the mouth he will hurt me bad. I am so scared of him this is why I have to stop.
What religion do you follow? I would say you have a more important reason than being afraid of him to stop. The reason you should stop is because it's wrong. I seem to be noticing a character flaw in you. 1. You mention you want to stop because you're afraid of him. 2. You mentioned you can't tell him what you've done because you are concerned about the consequences. 3. Elsewhere you've mentioned your husband is boreing. 4. Elsewhere you seemed to imply your husband doesn't give you enough sex. Do you see a pattern here? I do. The pattern is Me, Me, Me, and Me. You seem to be selfish and willing to put what you want above what is right. 1. I have to stop doing this because I'm afraid of my husband you say, not I have to stop doing this because it's wrong. 2. You can't come clean because you don't want to face the consequences for the behavior YOU, not anyone else committed. To be fair, being beaten or killed seems a bit harsh, but knowing the consequence and the fact it was wrong you
:'( :'( :'( :'(
Still carried on with your behavior. 3. Your husband is boring so you choose to do something you know full well is wrong. You betray him because he's boring. Does he care for you? Does he do as a husband ought to for his wife? Yet you think it's ok to betray him for your sexual pleasure. 4. You seem to imply he doesn't give you enough sex. I'm not sure how much you want, and to be fair husbands and wives ought to realize their spouse can't have sex with anyone else, so to deny ones spouse is cruel. That said, your desire for sexual pleasure overrides your sense of right and wrong and justice. Do you see that? Do you see the pattern. It goes like this 1. You justify your wrong doing in your heart and mind, 2. Even though you knew this was wrong and knew the consecquences before you did this, you still did it any way. 3. You want to stop out of fear of your husband not sense of right and wrong. 4. You seek to avoid all consequences of your willful behavior. This is called selfishness.
I guess I am selfish I didn't see it like that thanks for opening my eyes. I shall stop because it is wrong. I am a horrible wife and need to stop for my own good thanks so much.
I would tell you until you fix the root of the problem you can't fix the blossoming of the problem. The video chat and sexting are the blossoming. The root is selfishness. You being more concerned with pleasure than right and wrong. Until you are more concerned with doing right than with your own self gratification, this type of thing will likely happen again. You have a responsibility to God and your husband to stop this now and never do it again. I'd say start by examining your motives for doing this. You aren't the first to do something like this. You probably won't be the last. Your selfish attitude is common to human nature. It doesn't mean your a bad person. I don't condemn you personally, but do condemn your behavior. You'rehuman. You made a mistake. I think you have an obligation to cease doing what your doing and correct things as soon as you'reable. I think you have an obligation to never do this again. If your husband is boreing or doesn't meet your needswork it out with him
You're welcome. I hope I wasn't too harsh on you. I think the only way to help you was keep it real and call it like I see it. The truth shall set you free.
I understand I needed it.
He does it too but he thinks I don't know. :'(
Maybe sit and discuss an alternate life-style.
Did you start doing that because he does it? You are both cheating on each other. Your relationship can't work like this. You need to sort it out right now and decide whether to stay together or leave each other if you aren't satisfied.
Yes but in my religion man can be with multiple woman. The woman can not at all and the woman acts like she doesn't see nothing. If he finds out about me he will kill me. The husband is allowed to hurt his wife physically and a shame her in front of everyone. I am scared at the same time.
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That's exactly what I want.
How did you know that?
Too much to write on here...Short version I'm a Dominant spouse.
We been married for 4 years he was fun at the beginning not no more. To have sex I have to get it out of him. These other guys want me and crave me. I know it's not right but at least I am not actually sleeping with someone.
So your husband doesn't care about what you say and doesn't try to make it better? Have you tried counselling? If he doesn't care/want to make you happy anymore... I think you should consider leaving, You obviously know guys that want you. It think it would be the right thing to do than just keep having a thing on the side/cheating.I know it's hard to leave but that is just an excuse.. most people use to defend their infidelity.I think if you leave, you'll be happier.. life's to short to try and fix a mistake.
Thanks for your advice
No problem... I guess I've just seen to many couples try and stay together.."Make it work" and it always ends with them hating each other and they've wastes 15-20yrs of their life being miserable.
His so boring I tried it ALL. I do have sex with him but I want more. I try sexting him and he acts like he doesn't care.
so the obvious solution to you is to do it with other men who aren't your husband?come on
I am not saying I am right for what I am doing. But at least I haven't actually slept with another man.
well at least you don't have that on your rap sheet, but this is something that you have to work through WITH your husband, because you two are married. you said you tried once but failed, well you have to try again and try harder. he's your husband, so makes efforts to get through to him.
Okay thank you and I understand what you mean.
You're welcome pm me if you'd like
No its fun but it's not right I have to STOP not get more guys. You don't understand me.
Ok well then delete all contact info from these guys
And change your # and other forms of contact also
You're welcome hope all works for you. If these guys contact you delete the message and don't respond in anyway
Okay will do
I know but he is not filling my needs. I have talk to him and he doesn't care.
Talk to him again. Cheating is never ok.
Do you have any idea how narcissistic that sounds? He's not meeting my needs, so I'm going to cheat, because my needs are more important than doing the right thing by my husband and honoring my vows. This is essentially what you're saying. How is he not filling your needs? Not having enough sex with you? Not good at sex? What's the issue? Have you talked to him about the issue? What response did you get?
Ok I will try again I am so ashame of myself.
It's so hard I think of them all the time.
Well you need to stop contacting them. You're married. If you have sexual needs then your husband should be who you go to for them.
I do and we have sex but I want MORE. He can't give me it do you think I have a sex addiction?
It sounds like it
How frequently do you have sex? Look I was married once upon a time. My ex wife never had any sexual complaints. A complaint of wanting more sex from a wife would be one of the few welcome complaints a guy could get. What guy is going to complain about more sex? How often do you two have sex?
We have sex 3 times a week and I have to force it out him. Lately I want it everyday for the past 4 days. He always pushes me away or does the same thing and says his tired all the time. I want him so bad he haves a good package. I love when we have sex his face expression. So much more that I should not say. But I do love him I don't even know why I am doing this. :-(
Yes his just change so much