Friends with benefits, an Affair but no Sex is Confusing?

Anonymous
Please no judgements. My coworker and I became friends. (We hang out at work only, but are good work friends.) We are each in a committed relationship. I'm married, he's engaged. I'm 40 (and beautiful), he's 25. We're both in rocky points in our relationships but neither has plans to leave our SO. Anyway, we ended up sexting for a couple of weeks and he kept saying he wanted to be friends with benefits and have sex. I had romantic notions of a love affair, at a time when I needed the outside support. So the guy and I made out a couple of times and it was great and it made my relationship with my SO better because there was less pressure on him.

So I continued on and had sex with my friends with benefits. But half way through the deed, the guy freaked out and said he couldn't cheat on his SO in that way. He basically ran away but then immediately texted me, apologized and said he still wants to make out with me, just without sex. And after that he told me at work a couple of times that he still wants to be friends with benefits, just without sex. And he still wants to be good friends no matter what. But he's not texting me anymore, now that he got sex. He was texting me all the time before.

I'm more than a bit confused. I understand he feels guilty but was I just a conquest? Then why does he still want to make out? Can he really just make out without wanting more? (That's pretty hard to do). I really liked being chased, is that over or can I get him to do it again since he still wants to make out? (A big part of this for me was feeling appreciated and now that he pulled away I don't anymore).

I really like him as a friend and person and he's very sexy to me and I liked that he has a SO, that made it safe for me. So what's going on? And please, no judgements about the affair. You don't know our situations, sometimes life is complicated, and this actually has improved my relationship with my SO. Thanks.
Updates:
+1 y
Sorry, I should have been more clear. I got into this at a point when I need to feel appreciated. (I do know the risk to my marriage, I appreciate the concern but it's not a part of the question right now)

The question is, I'm feeling a bit used after the sex. Will this guy end up wanting sex again in the future? Can I get him to chase after me again if he only wants to make out? If I ignore him a little, will he chase after me again, or will he lose interest? I want to be chased again!
+1 y
Since he told me last week that he still wants to make out with me he hasn't made a move at all. But he told me thtee times last week that he wants to. But he's acting all awkward with me now and has not made a move and is even distant as a friend. Is this friends with benefits relationship over?
Friends with benefits, an Affair but no Sex is Confusing?
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