Hello everyone! I'll start by explaining my mindset and tendencies. I'm an incredibly monogamous person, and always have been. When in a relationship, I loose all desire for anybody except my partner. I don't check out other men or women, at all. Looking at other people becomes as bland and platonic as looking at a blob of jelly or a dead fish lol other people don't repulse me, I just have absolutely zero interest in them on sexual or romantic level. I also completely stop watching porn in a relationship. I've found that every man I've met, and been with in a relationship, has not been anything like me, and uses porn and checks out other women. Even the women in my life still have celebrity crushes, talk about the men they find attractive even while in a relationship, or use porn. I feel so alone, outcast, and abnormal. I find that in relationships, I often have this lingering feeling of loneliness even when I have a partner, because I have never had a partner that has understood that part of me. I wonder if I am all alone out here. Any input would be amazingly helpful! Thank you for your time.