When we first met he did a stupid joke by pushing my head down in front of his friend. It was 4 years ( 4 years!!! ) and I still can't get past the hurt to give him a bj even though I really want to and it really bothers me.
I also had to ask him to be more attentive in bed more. Now he is more attentive and I think it's only because he wants a bj (might be wrong).
I told him about this problem but he was mad about how I remember stuff from years ago. I'm sensitive when it comes to this and I need 100 percent reassurance that it's just me and my partner and the oral. But then I think about it , his friend's face pops up in my head.
SO LAST NIGHT he pushed my head down wanting one. I couldn't do it and told him that he never gave me oral either. He said that there will be a surprise in the morning but nothing happened.
Later that day when I asked him why he pushed my head even though we argued about it before and why we can't talk about it. Everytime I bring it up it's about me remembering stuff form ages ago.
Me- you never do it for me either
Him- Well, it works both ways
Me- You mean, because I didn't give you a bj you didn't go down on me?
Me- Seriously, that's what you just said? So , according to your logic it's an eye for an eye. You know you screwed it up for me with your stupid jokes and we argued about it. Haven't even talked properly. So did you not do it just because I didn't?
Him-Actually... I hate going down on women.
He KNOWS that I don't finish with seks alone
Should we break up?
PS. with my past partner it took me a couple of months to feel secure and trust him 100 to give him a bj and then it was all ok. He was also generous in bed always, went down on me even though I couldn't.