I am confused by this guy. He says we're just friends, but ee says things and acts like more.

There is this guy who says were friends but when we hang out its just the two of us. Twice this happened so far. We had a great time. We fooled around but what I want to know is, is he just using me? this has been since the beginning of this November. See we used to be friends about 3 years ago and he remembers a lot about me. Now we are catching up and when we have hung out it was just the two of us and he would say things like any guy would be luck to have me and he will put his arm around me and stroke my hair. He has admitted he wanted to hang out and see if we had our old connection. He jokes with me all the time how if we were like this 3 years ago we could have been friends right along. I could have saved him a lot of trouble in the past few years. He says he is not ready for anything serious right now however. I heard him say something about needing to get his head out of his ass as I was leaving the second time we hung out. The first time I went over I actually met his parents and sister. He does work full time and take night classes, so he is busy but he has recently stopped talking to me regularly but he started this before the second time randomly asking me to hang out with him. He also acted very touchy putting his arms around me and holding me. but that was the beginning of the week and again I have heard nothing from him. He also constantly asks me if I am okay and how my sister is who has cancer right now. I am getting mixed signals, granted I think I send him mixed signals too. I just don't know what's going on. should I wait it out and see what happens, should I try talking to him for a second time though he told me the first time he was not ready for a relationship. I just don't know what to think.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I would suggest cutting off the sexual aspect of your relationship now.

    You need to draw a distinct line between friendship and a romantic/sexual relationship. Otherwise you'll end up getting used or in a 'friends with benefits' situation, which you're probably not after.

    It sounds like you guys get along well enough, so the worst that can happen is you two end up good friends.

    But I've seen too many girls make the mistake of having consistent NSA relationships in hopes they will 'come around' and finally date them and it always just breaks their heart, so I always caution against the kind of behavior that leads to those situations.

    If you don't know how to get him to stop being so 'touchy', just ask him plainly "what am I to you" or "What are we?" kind of thing, if you ask him so straight forwardly you will get your answer one way or another.

    He will tell you he wants to be a couple or he doesn't want to be a couple, if he avoids it, he doesn't want to be a couple.

    Best of luck to you, and your sister as well.


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