In your own experience, if a person is eager to please you outside the bedroom, what's the chance they'll be eager to please you inside the bedroom?

I'm assuming that if a person waits until marriage to have sex, this is a primary trait they should seek in a spouse if they want to be sexually satisfied. Is that correct?
In your own experience, if a person is eager to please you outside the bedroom, what's the chance they'll be eager to please you inside the bedroom?
So, if a person is eager to please you outside the bedroom, is it more likely they'll be eager to please you inside the bedroom (compared to if they're NOT eager to please you outside the bedroom)?
  • It makes it MUCH more likely
    Vote A
  • It makes it more likely
    Vote B
  • It makes it somewhat more likely
    Vote C
  • It makes it a little more likely
    Vote D
  • It doesn't make it more likely
    Vote E
  • It makes it LESS likely
    Vote F
  • I don't have the sexual experience to answer this question
    Vote G
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What Girls & Guys Said

621
  • first of w-h-a-t are you getting at? the question is freaking confusing to be honest! secondly, its all about personal/religious beliefs, I absolutely have no qualms in taking the relationship to the next level with time passage w/o necessarily getting myself into a marriage.

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  • I'm not really sure about that anymore since I've had an experience that was like that with my ex. He would try his best to please me outside of the bedroom, but in bedroom, he was extremely selfish and close-minded. And it wasn't because he was inexperienced. So I don't know. I don't think it really means anything cause both are very different things.

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  • Honestly depends on the person I would be eager to please in all aspects of the relationship but just because someone loves buying you gifts or doing romantic gestures doesn't mean it translates to sex.

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  • No correlation. I’ve had girls that didn’t please me much outside the bed, but definitely inside the bed. They were good lays. I’ve had it vice versa to.

    That said someone who is naturally agreeable in nature will probably desire to please you in all areas but that does not mean they will. They may in fact suck at sex despite their desire please you.

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  • Depends.

    Some people are all bark and no bite.

    They can say anything but when you get down to if, they suck and you wish you wouldve just stayed home with your vibrator.

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  • Those two do not correlate, usually. I had ex's that would run any errand and do anything for me... but when it came to the bedroom, they were lazy and not willing to do much. 2 ex's were like that, I managed to train one out of that habit..

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  • I think it is more likely but only if it is genuine, many people aren't able to tell when someone genuenly wants please you outside the bedroom or is just pretending to get into your pants.

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  • My unscientific opinion.
    With men, highly likely.
    With women the connection is far less strong. I think this is because men feel and express love through sexual intimacy and women more through romance. So if my sexual relationship is good, I feel loved and will show it by being useful. I don't see that going the other way as much. A girl once told me this. A man who is eager to give a girl oral sex without expecting it back will do it enthusiastically and will want to please her in non-sexual ways as well. He is far more likely to be a "keeper". She also said that a girl can learn more about a guy from a session of oral sex than an hour of guarded conversation.

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  • Sex is a skill. And you'll be rubbish. Especially on your wedding day.

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    • 5 d ago

      "You'll be rubbish" are men that hard to satisfy? Especially if he's a virgin himself. He will be overjoyed just to feel a pussy wrapped around his dick.

    • 5 d ago

      Yes. I'm sure he'll enjoy the 1min of sex

    • 5 d ago

      @mistixs You are 100% correct!

  • Eagerness to please has not been a reliable indicator of whether or not someone is good in bed with me. Better ones are sensuality, being comfortable in her physicality, playfulness, openness to new things, and willingness to be led.
    If you're waiting for marriage to have sex, I think the best way to increase your odds of "success" would be to find the limit of what you're willing to do before that and play that line. A lot. Is it only penetration that's off the table? Then give and get a lot of head. Too much? Try mutual masturbation. Still too much? Then naked massages. Still too much? Then you might as well buy a lottery ticket, because you're going mostly on luck and guesswork for the sexual life you are choosing to commit to.

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  • It makes it much more likely, because it is a character trait and a mode of behavior towards you.

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  • Sex is weird. For most ordinary things people have no feelings one way or another. Bringing gifts, running errands, most people have little problem with these tasks. Sex is more like food. Some people love trying exotic cuisine, while other people want meat and potatoes every day. So if you want an adventurous (or at least varied) sex life, make sure your partner wants the same. If you plan to get married before having sex, you better spend a long time talking about what you both imagine for the future. How often do you imagine having sex? Daily? Weekly? Besides PiV, how do you feel about oral sex? Anal? Any kinky fantasies, like bondage, submission, spanking, etc? Otherwise at least one of you is very likely to end up frustrated, asking your partner to do something they never imagined you would want.

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  • If they pleased you outside than inside they basically would have a bigger surprise waiting for you although it does not always turn out that way

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  • It makes it much more likely assuming they don't get performance anxiety right before. 🤫

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  • I think at that point in time she knows I want to fuck her. My boner is so obvious

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  • I say A. I'm waiting to be de-flowered after marriage, but that doesn't mean I don't want it!

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  • Can you explain this a little better, I'm not quite sure what you're meaning

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    • 6 d ago

      Person A is eager to please you (even outside the bedroom). Person B is selfish and doesn't care much about pleasing you.
      Would Person A be more likely to try to satisfy you in bed?

    • 6 d ago

      Well yeah but doesn't that seem obvious? Not trying to sound like an ass

    • 6 d ago

      the want to please people is a huge turn off to me😀😀

  • It's more likely in my experience.

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  • Very much

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  • Do him he needs you

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  • I'm into both

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  • I dunno. I don’t aim to please anyone. Bite me.

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  • Yes why not unless they are gay

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  • It makes it MUCH more likely

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    • 6 d ago

      Aren't you a virgin tho? For this question I'm seeking answers only from people with personal experience:p

    • 6 d ago

      But it makes sense

  • People pleasers can have a hidden agenda, insecurities, control issues, be nosey or buttinskis. That said, being in control in the world can mean they want to be dominated or slaves in the sack.

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  • Short term yes, long term no.

    THe 'eagerness to please' tends to be the honeymoon stage. With time they will revert to their baseline level of sexual interest.

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  • If a couple waits to have sex until they are married they are not going to have quality sex.

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