‎(23M / 23F) Women Who Have Suffered From Mental Health Or Vaginismus And Have Never Had An Orgasm, What Things Have You Done To Improve/orgasm?

As a male with mental health issues (OCD & bipolar) i have found friendships difficult, however i recently re-connected with a close female friend who also suffers from the same (and other) mental health disorders. Recently i have been going through problems with connecting with my own body and we had a wonderful conversation about sex/relationships with mental health issues (i have her consent to share this information).

In her life she has been assaulted multiple times and faced sexism, as a result she has vaginismus. However due to medication and a lot of effort plus the use of dilators her metal has been improving and her libido to the point where she can be even more physical with her boyfriend of 4 years.

During the conversation she mentioned that she's never had an orgasm and found masturbation unrelatable. She explained that even though sex does feel good without an orgasm (which again as a virgin male i don't fully understand this) she has recently began to feel like a failure and has found some things difficult e. g. OCD and bodily fluids don't mix well.

She explained that due to mental health her and her bf's libido have never matched (his is higher), but slowly hers has been increasing. In the beginning of her relationship, not being physical almost caused the two to break up, but he is an amazing supportive guy (who also has mental health) and they are the perfect couple in my eye - something which i hope to have one day.

This was an amazing conversation and as my mental health has effected me physically now for 8 months in a similar way, it was an incredible weight of my solders to have someone to talk. However, due to my mental health i am a hyper-sensitive person and could not not feel down, i felt like i was a burden not being able to offer her advice/help her, or contribute to the conversation.

My hope is that, with the support of the good women here I could get some advice to pass on. if previously you never had an orgasm, how did it finally happen?


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