For a man, you either orgasm or not. Stuff come out or not. But I get the impression that for women, it's much more fluid. That you can have brief ones or long ones, small ones or intense ones, ones that come in a chain...
The fact that you are 56 and have never experienced any sort of spectrum is concerning. Even for a guy there is a spectrum. You need to learn how to edge yourself, or find a partner who knows what they are doing.
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