When I turned 10 my father started to touch my through my clothes everyday. He would put me in his lap and his member would poke me in the butt. He tolde that this would be our secret and mom doesn't need to know.
Once I turned 11 he started to take it a step further and touch me with out my panties on. He would kiss me on the cheek and rub me with his fingers. After about a month of this he started to finger me until I couldn't see straight.
The day I turned 12 he decided that that wasn't enough so he started to put things inside of me. From this moment on my girl part would hurt for a while. One time I bled for 2 hours until he decided he was tired of me.
When I turned 13 he invited my uncle to join in and that was when the first thing entered my butt. My father and uncle would enter me no matter how hard I cried. That went on until the day I turned 15.
The day I turned 15 I told my mother and she did nothing. So I moved in with my sister and that is where the abuse ended.
I have yet to have a night without waking up crying. Will I ever be normal? What do I do?
Please don't say the normal thing that most people say " I'm so sorry that happened to you" it doesn't help it go away.
If you have any advise that would be appreciated. Thanks for listening.
Most Helpful Guys
Yes you'll be normal again but it will take some time for this to happen ask God for help1
Somewhat different circumstances but sharing this in case it's helpful: deadspin.com/a-letter-from-a-parent-18274843190
Most Helpful Girl
Unfortunately there isn’t anything I can say that will take it away for you. The only thing that I think will help is this: it’s not about getting over it; it’s about getting through it. And getting through it again. And again and again because honey, it’ll never leave you completely. You lost an arm and with the best of healing and prosthetics you will still be down one arm. That’s grief that’s trauma and as much as I wish it wasn’t so, things like this don’t simply stop plaguing us.
But you know what you did? You stood up for yourself. You took charge of your life and changed it. You left because you decided that you had the power to control who you’re around and how you are treated.
You are incredibly strong to have done that. I cannot even put it into words.
My dog sleeps with me and he helped me get over my fear of the dark. When I was afraid some monster was coming to hurt me I’d reach down to him and put my hand on his fur. He was always sleeping peacefully and I knew that if anyone was there he’d be flipping out growling and barking. Maybe a dog could help you with the nights like mine helped me.1