Will I ever be normal again?

Please don't think this is a sob story. This is not a "feel bad for me" story. I need to get it off my chest. This actually happened to me. Preface, this is hard for me to talk about. Please understand that.

When I turned 10 my father started to touch my through my clothes everyday. He would put me in his lap and his member would poke me in the butt. He tolde that this would be our secret and mom doesn't need to know.

Once I turned 11 he started to take it a step further and touch me with out my panties on. He would kiss me on the cheek and rub me with his fingers. After about a month of this he started to finger me until I couldn't see straight.

The day I turned 12 he decided that that wasn't enough so he started to put things inside of me. From this moment on my girl part would hurt for a while. One time I bled for 2 hours until he decided he was tired of me.

When I turned 13 he invited my uncle to join in and that was when the first thing entered my butt. My father and uncle would enter me no matter how hard I cried. That went on until the day I turned 15.

The day I turned 15 I told my mother and she did nothing. So I moved in with my sister and that is where the abuse ended.

I have yet to have a night without waking up crying. Will I ever be normal? What do I do?

Please don't say the normal thing that most people say " I'm so sorry that happened to you" it doesn't help it go away.

If you have any advise that would be appreciated. Thanks for listening.


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Most Helpful Guys

  • Yes you'll be normal again but it will take some time for this to happen ask God for help

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Unfortunately there isn’t anything I can say that will take it away for you. The only thing that I think will help is this: it’s not about getting over it; it’s about getting through it. And getting through it again. And again and again because honey, it’ll never leave you completely. You lost an arm and with the best of healing and prosthetics you will still be down one arm. That’s grief that’s trauma and as much as I wish it wasn’t so, things like this don’t simply stop plaguing us.
    But you know what you did? You stood up for yourself. You took charge of your life and changed it. You left because you decided that you had the power to control who you’re around and how you are treated.
    You are incredibly strong to have done that. I cannot even put it into words.
    My dog sleeps with me and he helped me get over my fear of the dark. When I was afraid some monster was coming to hurt me I’d reach down to him and put my hand on his fur. He was always sleeping peacefully and I knew that if anyone was there he’d be flipping out growling and barking. Maybe a dog could help you with the nights like mine helped me.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 9

  • Believe it or not, therapy can help. You're a very strong-minded girl to be doing as well as you are. I hope you feel better, and I hope your father and uncle get the punishment that they so richly deserve.

    Remember, the best revenge is living well.

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  • Assuming this is all true, you need to get counseling, perhaps through your church. You should tell your mother and whether she agrees or not, talk to the police. I know it is family but they have harmed you and need to pay the price for it.

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  • I'd like to say yes but!!! Take what you've learned from your experience to help others. Be extraordinary. That's better than normal.

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  • So the father and uncle are not in prison for like 20 years or so?
    Probably the mother too for not doing anything.

    What you really need is probably a psychologist. Not because your insane or anything but because that persons job is to help and advise people who go through stuff like that to get them back on track with their life.

    Will u be normal again? I dont think your unnormal right now, u haven't done anything wrong. Scared from that experience, probably. Will it heal? With time yes i think it will.

    Also if u went to the police and even gave a hint of anything that has been done to you, u can be assured they will make sure your father or uncle can never touch u again, and would probably get you the professional psychological help you need, who would give you a thousand times better advice then anyone here ever will.

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  • Try seeing a therapist. I'm so sorry you had to go through something like that. That's horrible. Talking about it with someone such as a therapist can help you with the healing process.

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  • I followed you. shoot me a DM I was the guy who answered on your clarinet issue and have some follow up on that and some thoughts on this if you don't mind.

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  • Do you want them to pay for their crimes? Or a way to forget and erase it from your memory?

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    • I want it to be out of my mind

    • Show All
    • um no lol i am just saying you can have a friends with benefits or nsa or w/e but i guess working as a prostitute will work too and you make money but it could be illegal depending where you live

    • i am just telling you what helped me personally

  • Oh my god
    Now I'm really feeling frustrated

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  • Time heals everything. It will take time for you to come out of this. That should mean you shouldn't even see the faces of your dad and uncle who abused you. I think in a couple of years you will be able to come out of this with proper support and care.
    Someone should be there to stand with you during these times and the recovery will be a lot easier.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Try to go back to those times in your head and face the situation differently?

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