Why do people think promiscuous women have "issues"?

A lot of people say that sluts either daddy issues, insecurity issues, depression, sexual abuse history etc.

I was a very confident, beautiful woman.
I've never been a rape victim and no one sexually assaulted me either.
I had a great relationship with my father.
I didn't have depression or any mental disorders.

I had no "excuse" to be promiscuous. The reason I have a high sex drive and I enjoy sleeping with multiple men. I never cared about commitment and staying with one man. Why do people overlook and deny that as a reason?


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What Guys Said 32

  • They overlook it because you are an exception to the rule.

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    • 6d

      I rest my point, as regards my deputisation question the other day.

  • The reason they "overlook" it is because it is such a rare occurrence that its practically unheard of. Its like finding a drug addict who is ruining his life but has no emotional issues what so ever, sure its possible but so unlikely that its not really reasonable to even entertain the idea that your going to come across a person like that. Promiscuity is incredibly damaging and quite honestly I would never trust a self diagnosis of a person (in general honestly) who is performing a behavior that is known to be emotionally, psychologically, and potentially physically damaging. It simply doesn't add up. High sex drive? Okay, why so many men though? Why not masturbation or one person? You say your confident, okay, why? Is that natural confidence or does that come from sex? see the issue?

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  • It's a remnant of a misogynistic society. Women weren't allowed to own anything, even themselves or their sexuality. So, if you did something frowned upon, it had to be scapegoated with masculinity, i. e. "daddy issues", rape, incest, etc. I've never understood why mommy issues were never to blame. I knew a few girls who fooled around to deliberately anger their mothers. It's all garbage anyway, and we've come a long way. There's still a long way to go, but we've made steady progress for 50+ years. Do you, and don't worry about the mob heads.

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  • Promiscuous people have a lot of issues and scientific studies have shown that. I don't judge others for what they do but i might be more than a little off put in dating one

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  • Most of the time, promiscuous women DO have issues... A lot of many women's promiscuity is centered around a desire to feel desired and validated. Self esteem for both men and women comes from their relationship with their father, and siblings after that.

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  • I have this mind set; men and women can love sex and sleep with as many people as they want. What i have a problem with is when guys and girls sleep with anything that moves. I can never understand how you can go from saying hi in a bar to a bedroom without at least knowing the person even a little bit; how else are you gonna please the other person

    Sex isn't some carbon copy cookie cutter thing that works for every partner, it requires feelings and emotions and an understanding of someone's likes.

    Now if two people are hitting it off and there is definate sexual tension then go for it but the people that act like Barney Stinson from HIMYM (Where has a girl in bed within minutes) i just don't get at all and thats when i'd say they are hiding something

    But that's just my opinion as a demi-sexual person who although has "urges" i'm able to control them

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  • Because they usually do. There's something wrong with women who feel the need to go get railed by 60+ random dudes. It's gross

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  • Probably because the societal thinking of women is that women are more emotional and look for more stable relationships first and look for comfort first before amount.

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  • There may be exceptions to this (I may even have one or two friends who fall into this catgory), but let's be honest, the vast majority of promiscuous people full stop (men as well as women) have 'issues'.

    They don't seem especially happy with other things that are going on in their lives, and they use this as a coping mechanism. The men seem more willing to admit to it, though.

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  • I for one applaud you.

    People. always look for a "reason" when they don't understand or disagree.

    Be you, be happy

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  • Because you are looking at this all the wrong way. You're seeking an intellectual, cerebral explanation for an innate and genetically ingrained instinct within humanity.
    Speaking from the human behavioral expert's point of view here, in order to better understand the "whys" of this topic you must first better understand how human males and females have evolved over the millennia.
    The core trait within all species is to survive. If we go all the way back to our beginnings when humanity was still a primal, tribalistic race of primates, the drive to survive for men was to reproduce and pass on his bloodline. For females, it was to literally survive as long as they could because females lack the strength, speed, spatial awareness, sense of direction, construction, and hunting capabilities to survive in the wild. Human females need human males to protect them. In exchange for the male keeping her alive and protected in order to ensure her survival, the female carries out the male's drive to survive by having his offspring. Thus, the core need that all women seek in a male partner is strength; physical strength, emotional strength, and mental strength. The core trait men seek in women is loyalty. The man places the highest value on a female's loyalty to him because men are instinctually programmed to only protect their own offspring, and to view another male's bloodline as his enemy. Back then guys didn't have DNA tests to determine patronage, thus men had to be very confident his female partner would remain loyal to him.
    This applies to you because, whether we're aware of it or not, a female who is very promiscuous immediately loses value in the eyes of men. The instinctual side of us considers an unfaithful woman as someone who is not very bright, or is burdened by some type of mental or emotional issue since she refuses to play by the rules evolution instilled into us. On a primal level, a female who is this determined to refuse to demonstrate her loyalty & discipline as a sexual partner to a man is subconsciously seen by males as a female with a "death wish" since she can't survive on her own without male assistance. It's our inherited evolutionary instinct's version of a drowning person refusing the life vest and oxygen being offered to them.
    I just want to conclude by saying no amount of anti "slut shaming" campaigns that are launched to try to change this way of thinking will not work because attraction is instinctive, not cerebral.

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  • Cause plenty of promiscuous women do have issues.

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    • 6d

      Plenty of non promiscuous people have issues, too. Are you under the impression that teaching girls to be ashamed of their own bodies is healthy for them?

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    • 6d

      Promiscuity is inherently unsafe though due to the inherently faulty nature of protective measures. I'll leave you with some food for thought of my own: no self respecting man wants roast beef.

    • 6d

      90% of guys I've seen who shame promiscuous women do so because they're insecure. They know the woman is experienced they don't feel they can live up to her expectations. So they prefer virgins who don't know any better. I say this because it's clear that your "beef" is solely with promiscuous women and not men.

      I acknowledge that promiscuity is risky, for both sexes. But that doesn't mean that all promiscuous people are messed up, and it doesn't mean that every non promiscuous person isn't messed up. Everyone has their own stuff to deal with.

  • Honestly in my own opinion it's just the social ideals society has set in out minds about how to judge a person before meeting them so we can better safe gaurd ourselfs from being taken advantage. That and most societies have a huge issue with expecting how mental health should be addressed. Example men shouldn't cry. How ever crying is our way of being able to express exteremly emotional pains, it's health it's our natural way of coping also what's wrong with crying as a man. I would say bottling things up then exploding on someone or a group of people is worse.
    Lastly to be fair, man wemon who I am good friends with always seem to pick the bad boy type who will commonly slap them around and call them horrible things or treat them badly. Which makes completely no sence when they say they treat them well but when you examine the other person they are with they ussally are cheating on them.
    Example one of my good friends who just makes friend a with any women in hopes of a relationship to bloom will lie to my other friends about dating or if they had sex with a girl who they don't get along with or they will lie about themselfs being a drug dealer or user or both.

    Finally my position is bais a bit too because I grew up in an area with people whom where not kind to one another at all. The community viewed each individual as a thing or a tool not a person.

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  • Sluts have issues

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  • agree, but why do you feel the need to post this using 'anon'?

    obviously b/c you will attract the Tardis full of desperados on GAG. Which is countered by a simple click of the block button. but why not truly show confidence and empowerment by putting your name to the post?

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  • Honestly, i am what you would say is super promiscuous. I have slept with 40 plus people. I would say i have issues. Lol. On top of that the huge sluts thatbi remeber most of them have always seemes to to. I am not saying there aren't some people, but most from my personal amd the people i have met dont seem to be the best. With that said, with a lot of mental illnesses promiscuity/ drug abuse go hand in hand. Bi polar disorder severe depression schizophrenia. So i get not everyone but i feel like a solid 75% or a majority do.

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    • 6d

      Nah mate - you aren’t super promiscuous. Until you beat my friends record of 100 in one year, you are practically a virgin

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    • 6d

      Hidden_p is a girl.

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      At least someone noticed my gender.

      Also “my friend” is genderless in the sentence, you assumed it was a man. It was actually a woman.

      You might not be familiar with a term called “flippant”. Look it up, and you’ll discover that’s what I was being.

  • Because more often than not it's true. Studies have shown that there are links between those things and promiscuity too.

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  • You do you, if you wanna have sex then go for it.
    If I were a female, I'd be one hell of a promiscuous woman.

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  • Because it really is that hard for guys to imagine that girls actually get horny. Big Mouth put it best when someone told them girls get horny and there heads exploded

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  • Why'd you never cared about commitment?

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  • Because it is probably a subconscious reason. That also applies to man whores also. There is always a reason and high sex drive is an excuse not a real reason

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  • I don't think so.

    If anything, we need more promiscuous women, provided that there's no sexual diseases or children being sired.

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  • That's because society is misogynistic and judges women behaviours and relationships. If a guy is promiscuous no one judges him, society even congratulates him! So yeah, associating free women who enjoy sex with no commitment with being "sluts" is something extremely wrong.

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  • Because they usually have it! Stop pretending that promiscuous women (or men too) are generally well centered persons because they don't! In a frankly majority! They are usually using promiscuity as a escapism to a life without meaning!

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  • you're just seeing gender stereotypes and the double standard between the genders. Rock on being you, you sounds sexy as hell to me.

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  • That’s because they do.

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  • I dunno and don't wanna know
    These women have lost much n their personalities

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  • hummm you are ok live life dear

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  • Because no one wants a girl that's slept with tons of people. It makes her seem easy, and like she'll just sleep with whomever. It makes it difficult to trust that. It's a stigma, and guys like to be the ones with the bigger partner number. It's just how people's brains are wired to think.

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  • Testosterone is a far more heavier hormone by molecular weight, as opposed to estrogen. In return, causes men to have a higher sex drive than women per capita. That's why men are the initiators of majority of every relationship. We're the the ones supposed to think with our second head, not women. Women are supposed maintain the connection with emotion, using their main cognitive brain. At the end of the day, everyone wants to get laid, and it's easier for women to get laid than men. Given laws and predispositions. Women are protected more so through the judicial system than men, and thats why it's frowned upon.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Promiscuity is hated on because shamelessness in a woman breaks her free from the bullshit and ignorance boys try to keep us in.

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  • I think it is mostly women who imagine all that. I don't know what your behaviour is, but most women probably feel the need to imagine that the moment this promiscuity is ''aimed'' at their partners from women other than them. It helps them replace hatred with a sort of compassion, I guess.

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  • I thought for a moment that I was reading something that I might have written. Certainly fits me to the T

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  • The only people who care about this are found on GAG, in real life if you find such people they usually are full of it, and this quickest to either be slutty or fall for a slut.

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  • Ignorance. That’s all.

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  • primarily jealous people think of this

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  • There's always an exception to the rule. Some girls just like the D

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