Why is he so secretive?

So, I'm dating someone. We've been together for 3 months so far. Our relationship is sorta... taboo. I was going to school and he works there. I am a grown woman though, and he is a grown man. The weird thing is that I know that him and I have to take some time to go public about our relationship, but he is so secretive towards me. He comes over to my house 5-6 days a week and I have told him everything about myself, but he never tells me anything personal about him. For example: I have no idea where he lives. I know he lives in my city, but I don't know if he lives in a house, apartment, etc. To me, it makes no sense. I know nothing about his family or his past. He is very affectionate towards me and tells me how much he likes me all the time, but I really don't understand why he's acting the way he is and I don't know how to bring it up. There is no reason why I can't go over to his house for dinner one night, or even know where the heck he lives! Am I crazy or is this strange behavior ? Anyone have any comments or ideas as to what is going on? I would really appreciate it.

Thanks in advance


Most Helpful Guy

  • The most amazing thing in all this, is that you have been dating for three months and accepting this.

    It's not strange behavior from him, it's totally insane.

    • Because I really like him and I keep hoping that in time, we will be able to tell people we are together. He has promised me multiple times that once this celebration thing we're having at school is over, he will feel comfortable telling people that we are together. So I've been waiting for that. But it still doesn't explain why he has to be secretive about himself to ME, right?

    • Show All
    • Or don't enter the patio, because he won't tell me where he lives anyway lol. But thank you. Even if things don't work out, you still gave me a laugh!

    • Ah yes. Don't enter the patio, especially if there are animal skulls with flashing leds ornamenting the steps. Good luck ;)

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What Guys Said 2

  • I wouldn't know anything about that, could be he had a rough past and would not want to talk about it, or his past is completely off limits as he wants to focus on the present. Not sure really, I mean I'm like that as-well but the reason I do it is because my past is irrelevant in my relationship, I only care about my girlfriend/wife past and future. If she asks about it sure I'll answer depending on the topic, but if it's something that bothers me I will kindly ask her not to mention it ever again.

  • He probably lives with his mom so bringing you over to the house would be embarrassing

    • No, his mom is actually living in long-term health care facility. That's definitely not it.

    • Oh, well he clearly wants to hide a few things from you because he doesn't think you will accept it.

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