#LoveYourself
VALENTINE'S DAY

Does it look desperate or weird to gift a book to someone you used to date for Valentine's day or should I postpone giving it?

I and this guy dated for a month, but he said he doesn't see any dating aspect even though we have a lot of common things. He said the reason is because i am very liberal (not a retard one) and also an immigrant with an accent (came here as a doctoral student) vs. his parents are very conservative from Texas, and after this age (29 he is) he really doesn't wanna hookup but look for a wife suitable to his family.

Of course, I don't make a big deal, and now i am seeing someone else, yet we keep in touch as we like fantasy books. He introduced me a great series of books but he is missing a prequel book from his collection.

I wonder if it would be weird or stupid or look like i am trying to get him back to gift him the prequel book to thank him for introducing me these books, and his friendship. I am really just being friendly, and not trying to win him over as he clearly thinks marriage or dating includes a family and lives his life according to them.
  • Yes, weird, postpone
    Vote A
  • No, not weird, give
    Vote B
  • Other, depends
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • since you guys still talk and stay in touch it seems like it's just a nice friendly gesture... however because it is Valentine's day it may be construed on his part as being somehow romantic. you could make it clear that it's just a friendly gesture with a note specifically mentioning the word 'friend' in it

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What Guys Said 1

  • i think its fine if you want him to read a book as a friend but to gift him a copy as a valentine sends out the wrong message. maybe wait a week or two

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    • I mean i dont really care about vday and never celebrated because i find it stupid but i dont know what others think or if others put emphasis on it

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    • thanks a lot for your help.

    • no problem. its what im here for

What Girls Said 1

  • Do not give it to him and he sounds like a dick

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    • Why would he sound like a dick? I mean he didn't force me to have sex, he took me out to dates and he treats me nice when we meet. I dont wanna get in between parents and son.

    • He won't accept you cause you're an immigrant? 🤔

    • He is very close to his parents. I know then from facebook to be very patriotic americans and very christian. I am not christian. I dont believe and i was raised as muslim but i am like anyone you can find in Europe. I saw his parents shared his older brother’s wedding photo and said he is married to a lovely American girl like dissing me for being not American. I am a highly educated liberal and openminded person however i value family as well and i would not demand anybody to be in conflict with their family for me even though i find it ridiculous to live a life according to your parents when you dont share their values

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