Guys, what makes you feel like a man?

I once read, there are 3 essential rules of what drives a man: who is his (his title), what he does (how he got that title), and how much he makes (the reward he receives for his efforts).

All three of these items need to be in sync for a man to feel he has fulfilled his destiny of being a man. These 3 resources are what gives the man the ability to be the provider & protector of his family, anything less, and he doesn't feel like a man.

Do you agree with this statement?
  • No
    Vote A
  • Yes
    Vote B
  • I like living without a purpose
    Vote C
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
So, the statement is basically saying, if a man does not have a title, job, source of income then he doesn't feel fulfilled as a man, because he cannot supply the basic necessities of life for himself or his family. Real men do what they have to do to make sure their people and themselves are taken care of, clothed, housed, and reasonably sastisfied, and if they're doing anything less than that, they're not men.
I honestly study the behavior of men as a hobby lol! Here are a few sites that I frequently visit:

Would Love to Hear Opinions on the sites & this Movie:
People are confused on terminology:
Gender identity - refers to a person's innate, deeply felt psychological identification as a man, woman or some other gender. Sexual orientation -referring to an individual's physical attraction to the same and/or opposite gender, straight, gay, bisexual, asexual
Gender role/expression refers to all of the external characteristics and behaviors that are socially defined as either masculine or feminine, such as dress, grooming, mannerisms etc.
More sites:,
What caused the switch in defining manhood


Most Helpful Guy

  • I agree with that statement.

    For me, what makes a man is someone who can provide for others, has great character. Protects his women and loves how to treat a women.

    A man is an ambitious man who seeks to achieve things for himself and possibly his friends and family.

    A man is a man who believes that working for what you desire and is passionate about should be more valuable then someone who works just for the money.

    • This is a very thought out answer & I appreciate you for sharing it ;-)

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    • My issue with this statement is where does that put a man like the Dalai Lama?
      He is a good man by many standards, but not in any way defined as a traditional man.

      Yet he does much for society.
      His path certainly is not wrong. He is definitely fulfilled.
      This cause me to wonder, what value does "being a man" even have?

      Men take many different paths. Empathy, love, protection. These are traits all people have, not just men. A woman is defined by her ability to support her man and protect her children. Are those in contrast with the definition of a true man?
      The reality is, all genders do similar things that define us as exemplary humans. Men and women, due to gender roles, have different ways of expressing those exemplary behaviors.

      My issue with your statement is that its not altruistic. I understand altruism is not common or always held in high regard, but it is an inclusive viewpoint, and is often more beneficial to non-altruistic viewpoints.
      But there is great groundwork in it.

    • @IronDr4gon Weird, cause I'm a "White Knight" type. Though maybe not in the stereotypical way you would think.
      Yet I have been defined as an "alpha male" and as an exemplary, good human being. I did not sacrifice myself to become that kind of person.
      That person is who you evolve into if you follow that path for all the right reasons and invite wisdom into your life as the months go by.

      There is no weak and submissive within a man who cares for others regardless of whether they share his skin color, sexual orientation, or genital design.
      A man who cares for others does not submit easily if he truly wishes for their well-being. He does not love under conditions, but he does not let others settle for less than they can give or take more than they deserve from him.

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What Guys Said 144

  • There factors are far more extrinsic rather than intrinsic for me to agree with them. So I voted A).

    Although personally I feel that "feeling like a man" is absolute nonsense, it is just the result of peer pressure forcing you to adhere to gender stereotypes , and you feeling that matching it is an obligation. Otherwise, that is all they are: stereotypes.

    If you want to be a good person, you can do that without attributing it to your genitals. So in the end, I am not sure I can answer this question, but i know that i would not answer it: one of the problems in the world is exactly that this question is asked of many, including by themselves.

    • I love coming to a question to find Mes has already posted my answer. Thanks mate.

    • One of the only good answers to this question. Totally agree, Mes.

  • Women aren't real women unless they have massive tits, a well shaped ass; a college education; and make babies. A woman isn't a real woman unless she has a job. If a woman lacks direction, then she's not a real woman. Other women aren't women without those qualities.

    If a woman doesn't have a baby, she's not a real woman. In order for a woman to feel fulfilled, she has to spit out babies. A real woman doesn't have sex before marriage. A woman has to be protected and cared for, as the cum bucket: if she's not protected and pumping out babies, she won't feel fulfilled as a person. etc. etc.

    Must be difficult to imagine, since women have very few requirements to actually be considered women. Ultimately, in Western society, a woman is a woman if she is a woman. A man is a man only if he follows a set guideline for behavior and accomplishment. Oooooookay.

    I am absolutely certain this is how *women* define men "who is his (his title), what he does (how he got that title), and how much he makes (the reward he receives for his efforts)." These are clearly absolutely 100% things women look for in men. Social status. Ambition and confidence that created that social status. And money. Naturally, I'm sure men latch on to these things when they realize that is what women want. And I'm sure there are some guys who naturally are that way. But. To define a man based on three qualities. Ch.

    You wanna know what makes me feel like a man? My fucking power. I am a man, because anyone who says that I'm not a man is going to get a fucking fist in the face. I'm a man, because I fucking say I'm a man. And as a man, I do not adhere to arbitrary standards set on me by other people. I live my life as I see fit. No one gives me the *right* to be a man. I take it. It's mine.

    If my purpose is not a purpose that *you* endorse, I am not a man. Alright then. Let's turn it around and set standards on your life. You're not a real woman unless you have qualities that *I* declare are womanly.

    What makes you feel like a woman? Anything? Because there are no requirements for women?

    • All fluff, no detail, & overwhelmingly emotional. You really didn't say anything at all...

  • I feel like a man because I know...

    1. How to act. I know how to treat people.

    2. How I should be treated. If you treat me as anything less than I expect to be treated, I will disrespect you almost to the point of saying something about it. But I won't, because I'm better than that. More than likely I will completely ignore you unless you decide to get physical. Then it's a whole different ballgame.

    3. That I respect myself and know that I deserve the respect of everyone around me. I will afford everyone around that same basic courtesy, assuming they afford other people the same.

    4. That I will vehemently defend anyone else against any type of bullying or discrimination. All people deserve respect, if they're willing to return the favor. If you can't treat a waiter, a prostitute, a homeless person with basic human dignity, then I will be the first to correct you.

    5. Lastly, That I take care of myself and my finances. When I wasn't yet a man, I had to borrow a grand from my grandmother to become the kind of person I wanted to be (I was 26 at the time). Now that I'm a man, I've paid her back every penny and am completely self reliant, with solid future prospects and financial investments. I work out at least 5 times a week, eat a fairly healthy diet, and make my physical body an expression of the type of man I am.

    • Excellent response! Your level of self awareness is what many guys on this site is missing. You are confident, you set goals & achieve them, you are a solid human being and a true example of what more guys should strive to be. Thank you for having a plan & some direction in life. There are way too many guys living aimlessly & without a purpose.

  • 12|11
    • 😂😂😂😂

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    • Some of the best men I've known were female. :-)

      A young woman in the military is both a woman and a man who has stepped up to stand between her people and harm. That's a man's job most times because we're expendable and mothers aren't. A society can recover with just a few men left. Women, not so much. Normally you keep them safe. The ones that fall in as a soldier are special.

    • Wow! That's an Awesome Answer @Dionysos! Thanks for commenting ;-)

  • Lifting heavy ass weights and earning my calluses.

    • get some lotion.

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    • It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again! PUT THE LOTION IN THE FUCKING BASKET! !!!

    • Hilarious @gapminder!

  • Doing useful things makes me feel like a man. Today I helped a friend by taking care of his dog, another, by babysitting her kid, and got a few projects done on the boat. I cooked a ham and some red potatoes and fed my neighbors and sat around drinking beer and shooting the shit with em.

    Today was a good day.

    Bottom line: Men are useful to others. Doesn't much matter how. Males just have a wiener.

    • That did sound like a good day! Thanks for the input!

  • We need to be doing things... We can't give birth, so we feel like we need to compensate by doing things and building things or making things, or going places. But we also need someone or something to be doing all these things for... someone or something that will make "going out of our way" to do something great worth it in the end. Without that someone or something, we tend to fall into idleness and deadbeats and losers. I think we often feel like unless we have a reason to prove ourselves, we not going to, but when we do have a reason, we can really rise to almost any challenge.

    I know I never feel more like a "man" than when I'm doing things for other people, especially lovers. There are so many things I simply won't do even for myself if I don't have anyone to impress by doing them. When I'm out of a relationship, I tend to fall into disrepair for a while... when I come into a new relationship, suddenly I can move mountains again. A lot of it gets chalked up to "hey doing this could get me laid" ... but it's more than that. Helping others is the only way I can help myself sometimes.

    • Watch a pride of lions. The females do the hunting, protect the young and feed them. The male hogs the food, and kills off the young from any other male to bring it's mother into season so he can get laid.

      The only reason they keep a male around is because he can kill hayenas with one swat and pull a small hippo out of the water to take it from the crocs.

      Well that and maybe they like sex, lol! Anyway, males are there to be the problem solvers in most species. Us included. It's why we evolved stronger and faster with better eye hand coordination.

    • Thanks for giving your comment a personal touch @Mark01, I appreciate the input. Great Example @Dionysos!

  • I think that a lot of it does have to do with career, but I think that there are a lot of things outside of that.

    They also say it's not healthy to put all your worth into one thing (usually a job), because if you lose that, you feel like you've lost your worth as a man. Same with a woman. If all your confidence or hopes and dreams was in a woman, and you broke up, that'd be a huge blow.

    I feel manly when I walk a woman to her car, (and where she appreciates it (no, not "appreciates" in "that way."), when I can open something, or fix something. When I can be helpful.

    Part of it is I suppose playing shooting games, or something like Halo with the guys. We're trash talking, planning a strategy, etc.

    I suppose if a woman flirted with me (only happens maybe once every few years), I'd feel pretty manly. If she was being really feminine about it... that would work.

    Having passions and interests - I don't feel that this is inherently "manly" but I suppose there's that aspect of "masculinity" - the quest. The adventure. Something that isn't about the woman, but about going and doing whatever your inner drive is about... I think that feels "right." A confidence booster. I don't think I feel "masculine" though I think it's in there somewhere. A sense of accomplishment.

  • I don't judge a man by any of the choices in your poll. I don't judge a man by what he has (his assets), or what he gets paid in in income. I judge him by what he went through to get where he is and achieve what he has.
    I feel like a man if I can walk into any place and know I have more between my ears and between my legs than the next 99 men, and nothing scares me (except crocodiles). At times I've been richer, and at times poorer, but that doesn't count for shit.
    I'm still prepared to walk into situations where I think I might die, if I have good reason and it's what I believe in. I've survived so far, and lost count. When no-one else has the answers , and I do, I'm prepared to work 3 or 4 days x 24 to make it happen (if the cause justifies it). With a few long days in between (but some sleep), I'm prepared to do the same the following week.
    You can stick your titles and dollar values where the sun doesn't shine. They mean nothing, compared to know-how and dedication.
    I know of one man who once worked 2 weeks x 24 hours (no sleep) to save his family's assets. I would call him a man.

    • Your argument just failed when you said, "I know of one man who once worked 2 weeks x 24 hours (no sleep) to save his family's assets. I would call him a man" because that is exactly what the statement says, "All three of these items need to be in sync for a man to feel he has fulfilled his destiny of being a man. These 3 resources are what gives the man the ability to be the provider & protector of his family, anything less, and he doesn't feel like a man." So what exactly is your point?

      Where does this statement say anything about assets or dollar amounts. Try to read for an understanding, before commenting.

  • When your able to support yourself, preferably with a job/career that complements your strengths so your able to get better and better so your more valueble and get paid more. Selflessly sacrifice your wants and needs to support the people you love especially your kids if you have any. Also be willing to protect your Wife and kids at all cost even if its something small like ''defending her honor''.

    • Great answer! Thanks :-)

  • I have worked all my life. I spend weeks away at a time, earning a decent salary to help support my wife in our home. We pay our bills on the first of every month. When I'm home , I work on the house, the garden and the car. We go on hikes and camping trips in the summer with our dog. We mind our own business. And make time for friends. We are polite and helpful to those we meet. A strong character, honesty and hard work (proper work with calloused hands) is, what I believe makes a man.

  • “And a man, a man provides. And he does it even when he’s not appreciated, or respected, or even loved. He simply bears up and he does it. Because he’s a man.” –Breaking Bad

    • Awesome qoute! Loved Breaking Bad!!! Thanks for Commenting ;-)

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    • If I coud have given another MHO, your comment would have gotten it :-)

    • Thank you. The person you gave MHO, gave a very good response. He deserved it.

  • I disagree. Ironic I disagree too, since I'm literally a workaholic.

    I disagree because the fact I was born a man makes me a man. Unless I get a sex change, I'm going to be a man. I feel like the things listed are traditional gender roles which need to be abolished.

    If you ask me, it's wise for a woman to work hard, be ambitious and provide as much as they can too.


    this is one representation.

    • Hilarious video, thanks for posting it!

  • To me, being a man has been about independence. I'm living on my own about 250 miles away from my family, and taking care of business with school. I have already gotten farther in terms of school than my father has (who only recently got his GED), and I am away from my family while one of my older brothers (33) and my older sister (38) are still at home.

    • That is awesome! I wish you well, stay positive & don't give up on completing your education!

  • Everytime I see myself when I am taking a shower, I realise that I am a man.

    ------> jokes apart <------

    1. I'm the saviour of the world. I came here to make this world a happier place. The whole weight is on my shoulders.
    2. Well God/nature and my deeds gave me that.
    3. The biggest reward for me is watching others happy ^_^

  • Title, job, source of income? Men were around long before civilisation and any of the man made crap above. Dominating a woman sexually, beating the hell out of another guy, doing a job well, making a plan that goes well. Have other men respect your opinion and follow you. That make you feel like a man

    • Really, so at the beginning of civilization you believe men didn't have jobs, well roles to fill, & weren't taking care of their families? How in the world do you believe we've evolved into what we are today?

      What exactly are you arguing, you just agreed with the statement when you said "doing a job well".

      Also, how do you gain respect from other men if you cannot show you are a leader who knows how to protect & provide? You know those are the basic foundations of gangs and cults as well.

    • I think its more complex than all of that. Look at the attitude of most leaders. They don't like their subordinates because they have to be told what to do all the time.

      I think most men would like a world where everyone provided for themselves. It doesn't matter if you can provide for others, no one is going tor respect you if you can't even take care of #1 (aka YOU)

    • @IronDr4gon, What exactly are you arguing? No one will ever be labeled a Leader if they cannot take care of themselves. That's what draws other people to you and make them want to be like you. You're just repeating everything I said.

      "They don't like their subordinates because they have to be told what to do all the time." - Generalizing, this is not the attitude of most leaders, especially not compassionate ones who value their subordinates.

      "It doesn't matter if you can provide for others, no one is going tor respect you if you can't even take care of #1 (aka YOU)" - Really? Did you not read this part, "who is his (his title), what he does (how he got that title), and how much he makes (the reward he receives for his efforts)." That means you have a title, job, & steady flow of income, so obviously you are taking care of yourself. Furthermore, it does matter if you can provide for others, especially if you have any type of dependent wife/children/parents/friends/otherfamilymembers

  • Being a man means you take care of business. I work in the oilfields there are a lot of guys out here that make a lot of money. I see both types of guys even out here. I see 30 guys I wouldn't consider a man and im 23. I know a guy who washes dishes for a living and pays his bills and takes care of his family. That's a man

    • I agree, thanks for the examples!

  • For me what makes a man is: peeing standing up, compartmentalizing thoughts and feelings more naturally, less/no attention to fashion/style comparing.
    I never really thought of supporting myself as that manly. My mom supported me til I was 20.
    Yay stereotypes!

  • To me, being a man is thinking maturely. Being mature. Just like a woman who isn't a girl anymore. So to sum it up, being a man or woman to me is being an adult and not act like a child. At least most of the time lol

  • No, I don't agree with that statement at all.
    I believe the role of "man - protector and provider" is outdated and pretty much irrelevant in today's structure of society, that is... unless you still live somewhere in the 3rd world.
    There are however plenty of men who still believe that and measure their accomplishments in that manner, while many others chose to pursue their own ideals of happiness instead. In the past you wouldn't be considered a man until you had a wife and kids and supported them. Nowadays, women can do that easily on their own so they don't need a man anymore. Men too can live fulfilling lives on their own without the need to prove their capability to raise and support a family. Less and less people choose marriage, while divorce rates are still very high. The need for the economic nature of marriage is not there anymore, while the disadvantages, especially for men, make it an unattractive high-risk venture.

    • But you didn't answer the question, what makes you feel like a man? Or is the saying "feel like a man" outdated to you as well?

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    • voted A, maybe could have voted C as well because the plans I have for life usually don't coincide with the value system a vast majority of others seem to adhere to
      specifically, I don't place money as high a priority for me as others would do. Sure, it's important to be able to support yourself and have a bit of a insurance for the future, but I'd like to just have enough to enjoy a comfortable living and be happy than have more than I need and in the process sacrifice a lot on the altar of a corporate or political career.
      Then, there's the family thing. Many people will just go on and say by which age they want to be married and how many kids they'll have. I would rather be happy in a relationship or outside one than just be married. As for the kids, should they come... they'd be welcomed, but I wouldn't place a human soul on a "to do" list. I simply couldn't.
      So there is no plan except maybe "do the best you can".

    • I see, so everything that is mentioned in the statement is apart of what you want in life but it won't make you feel like a man once its all accomplished, because the term "feel like a man" & "men being the protector & provider" is outdated to you.

  • That is very well said, Men need a purpose, there is too many lost men now days, myself included, i am still young and finding my way
    Do you have that book? if you let me know the name and author i would like to check it out

  • I disagree with this statement because first of all, who says there's only 3 essential things or that they are these same things for ALL men? That's a generalization which is not fair & is assumptions & sexist.
    Second of all, the part that says, "These 3 resources are what gives the man the ability to be the provider & protector of his family, anything less, and he doesn't feel like a man." is BS. How dare the party who says this claim that one has to be a family man and be a protector of them to feel like a man! NOT all men are family men... nor ever will be...(some of them).
    It takes a man to be gracious and strong after being through the emotional traumas of a bad divorce, war in the service, falling from grace of having a two story house, good job & car, jail for 3 & 1/2 months, homelessness, and living alone without being lonely because he knows who he is & doesn't feel the need to prove himself as much as some of the ego maniacs out here... making some of the same foolish mistakes HE MADE.

    Now to still smile & be a decent, mature human being after all that... THAT'S a man... who can FEEL like a man.

  • I don't define myself according to status, etc.,... I know who I am and where I want to be in life. The only people I need to earn respect from are my daughter, gf and parents.

    My parents because they took care of me when I was young and could not , so I need to return the favour someday;
    My GF because she is the love of my life and I want her to be taken care of in life.
    My daughter because I love her more than life itself and she relies on me.

    That's what defines me.

  • Honestly no, A stock broker can be proud of him self and his position and make a ton of money, an a military man has a title and something he is proud of but doesn't necessarily make big bucks, does that not make him a man? Fuck no, if he is willing to lay down his life like that for non material rewards he's a man. A man is not measured by his money, but by his self worth.

  • I feel like a man whenever i help a woman out with anything. Just to give a girl a sigh of relief makes me feel great. So i guess thats kind of right

    • That's sweet! Thanks for commenting ;-)

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    • Fine. I won't have to help my mother out with groceries anymore. People dont have to pay child support to women that are more than capable. I can slam the door in womens faces at the mall. Yeah, women dont NEED help, but its nice to have. If you feel inferior just because someone offers you a helping hand, then its just something wrong with you.

    • @Varanus you were out of line. Very well spoken @FlowerLovingFiend. You killed it @HappyToBeAlive, with "If you feel inferior just because someone offers you a helping hand, then its just something wrong with you."

  • What is this bullshit I'm reading? Anyone who identifies as a man is a man. Anyone who identifies as a woman is a woman. End of story.

    In what world does one's role in society equate to gender identity. I mean really... what the utter fuck?

    • I know, right?

      There's a lot of disturbing notions of the cultural implications of gender identity in here.

  • I've never much understood why people make such a big deal out of gender identity when we do not choose our genders. how can something which you do not choose define you? yet, when I fell in love, I did come to have some degree of use for the concept of manhood. For me, manhood is defined by how well I take care of my wife. childish pride in social status certainly isn't a factor, and the amount of money made is of course meaningless because it's circumstancial. If a depression hits and you get laid off you are not suddenly less of a man than you were before.

    • What exactly are you arguing? You just said your agreed to the statement when you stated, "For me, manhood is defined by how well I take care of my wife", that is exactly what the statement says, "All three of these items need to be in sync for a man to feel he has fulfilled his destiny of being a man. These 3 resources are what gives the man the ability to be the provider & protector of his family, anything less, and he doesn't feel like a man."

      Where is social status ever mentioned? When was an amount of money ever designated?

      "If a depression hits and you get laid off you are not suddenly less of a man than you were before" ~ This is true, but it does not negate the fact that some men do feel less because they can't take care of their family and its nothing wrong with that, it shows how devoted they are to their families. You are lost if you have never heard of this before.

  • Is there any difference between man and woman? i thought we are pass that, FYI man and woman both work and share all the house roles in Europe.

    • The question says nothing about women, house roles, or Europe.

      So, let's try this again (focus), "What makes you feel like a man?"

  • Bullshit. People should do whatever the hell they want. Don't feel like you have to conform to some imagined concept of 'being a man'.

    • Ok, so you don't agree with this statement. So what type of plan do you have mapped out for your life or do you live without any goals & direction?

    • Well, I'm reading Physics at UConn with a view to being a Research Physicist. I also have a loose plan to enter Formula Drift whenever I finish up working on my Miata. Aside from that I take life as it comes.

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What Girls Said 15

  • For the last 4 years I've out-earned my husband. Before then, he was a man. Now he wears panties and wants to be called Sally... WHAT? No.

    For the last 4 years I've out-earned my husband. This has changed absolutely nothing at all about the dynamic between us. Because, whatever.

    What makes a MAN, in my eyes, is... let's call it the "Prometheus" model.
    * You have fire,
    * You can control it.

    My husband has this burning fury that's always there below his surface (his childhood was very rough). That's the fire. And quite a fire it is-- I've seen him provoked into a fight, and WHOA.
    But he has it under PERFECT control. In the 15 years I've been with him, number of times I've felt threatened by it? Zero. If he lets it out, he'll only do it to protect me.

    He also has a burning libido. He loves women, he loves sex. He thinks as many dirty thoughts about post-menopausal matrons as he does about young hotties. I see him look at women, I know what he's thinking. I don't care, because I know he's gonna take it out on me... Oh yeah. (:

    That's what makes a man. Having that energy, and channeling it.

    If the energy is there, but it's not under control... that's a little boy.
    When the energy is gone... that's an elder.

  • hmm... i would rather he be respectful, kind and capable but without the respect or kindness i'm not likely to have a second thought about a guy no matter what his job or how much money he has.

  • I agree that men love challenges and crave respect. A man stuck at home without a job often becomes idle and dissatisfied. A woman could feel that way just the same though.

  • I know this question isn't addressed to females however,

    Actions do not dictate one's gender or sex
    If an individual is born with a penis and identifies as a male then he is a man.

    People will disagree as some out there absurdly think people are not entitled to their gender or sex but what EXACTLY constitutes a man or a woman?

    Sorry for going off tangent :/

  • I do not agree at all. This entire list reeks of traditionalist and sexist BS. Why should the man always be the provider? Why should the man always be dominant? Why should the man always be the protector?

    People should do whatever they want to do. This isn't the 1950's.

    My boyfriend does not meet any of the criteria on your list, but it doesn't make him any less of a man. Unless of course, your definition of a man is a very shallow and close-minded one.

    "Real men" do whatever the hell they want, they don't need to be shoved into little gender boxes.

  • personally, I don't belueve a guy feels like a man only but the question of how much money he makes. I do, believe belueve men wish to provide & prtect in irder to feel like m

  • lol im like the counterpart to your studies. lol meaning i study the crap outta everything female! :) we should chat sometime

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  • Reading all these comments from guys is really cracking me up

    • For me, it's less with the funny and more with the WTF.

  • If you're anything like @theending you're a real man. (:

    • He didn't place any thing here
      You waste my time searching for his opinion here
      What you believe in him is not our business to tell us something we don't need
      What the heck

    • @markony Whenever you want to search for something on any webpage just do the following:

      Hold Ctrl, press f and a search functionality will pop up in your browser. Just type in the word you're looking for and it will just highlight it for you.

    • @markony Your other mistake is taking advice from a 17 year old. ;)

  • they used to say, what you eat makes what you are. bomb the iran and that makes them. uni bomber

  • penetrating a woman...

  • Yeah I agree with it.

  • What makes a man a man is that he identifies his gender identity as a man full stop.

  • I know you're asking about men and I'm sure what makes each man feel like a good person will vary. But I'm reminded if his bizarre these things are addressed between men and women.

    There's something imicitly degrading about what is supposed to make you feel like a "women". Usually feeling like a woman is supposed to mean feeling soft and cared for and caring and pretty. . As if being strong brave Respectful having a good job making money having a career being responsable for those around you - makes you a good human being- Then it's something "else" to be a woman. Whereas a man can be a human being while being a man. Its As if to be a woman you have to have a double consciousness.

    I'd love to be able to say woman and take pride in that. but it's so limited in my culture that there's no way to think of woman and see a strong self respecting productive responsible assertive courageous member of society and see that image. Now technically I know I should be able to see who I am and think women. It's not simple... People actually tell women who are fully human that they are not comfortable being a woman. So there's a certain negative association. For the purpose of clear Communication I say human instead of woman. So people are not automatically biased as to what I'm referring to.

    So I never talk about myself as " woman" just a Human being. Bc the conventional definition of a woman is just so absurd and demeaning.

    I'm sure men feel somewhat similarly about how being a man is supposed to make you to be some kind of super sized machine. But I won't speak for anyone but myself.

    • Yeah I hate how society has labeled being a man. Also what you are experiencing is called complemtarianism.

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