Search Results: choosing between my friend and my ex

Hi

Was seeing a very nice guy, not for very long but intense. Then his ex wife turned around and said she wanted him back, after years of rejection whilst they were together, and just as the divorce has been finalized. He has been in a constant state of confusion, and also had bad flu and busy work at the same time. This situation started the Friday before last and it's carried on till now. He's assured me he is not still in love with her, it is just that they share history and that I should not doubt his feelings for me. But at the same time, we said we'd talk in more depth the next day (last Thurs), but he was busy with clients and then texted saying he wouldn't know what to say anyway because he is still in a daze. I said I wanted my stuff back but it can wait and I'll give him space. I also said I wish we could go back to laughing and joking.

The situation has got me very down, not eating or sleeping, and tonight I sent a text saying "Let's talk tomorrow. I want to sort out getting that stuff back.

I want to leave him with a card, which I will tell him to throw away if he gets back with his ex wife.

Inside, it'll say:

(1) If you are reading this, and have gone back to your ex wife, still now you are still undecided and have made a mistake. You are still curious about me. It shows you do not truly love your ex wife and failed to throw me away, as a card or a person. It is unlikely you two will work again, especially considering this, but you choosing her then looking back at this card (me) could have easily happened the other way around, and I am glad to be spared the hurt.

(2) If you are reading this, and chose not to go back to her... I guess I can't promise it, but I might still be interested in seeing what could develop between us. It was short term but intense, and the kind of click that happens rarely in life. There is so much I like about you, your open face, your kindness, your gentlemanly and above all your sense of humor. I even like the fact you are a bit of a walkover sometimes - you are kind, and so am I, and two kind people might work well together. It's so hard to say after so little time to get to know one another, but I know we both felt a connection that could have developed or may yet develop into something more. Call me, we can consider friendship, and see how it goes. At the very least, I'd be happy to have you back as a friend.

(3) If you are not reading this, because as instructed you have thrown it away when you chose to try again with your ex wife, then I am in many ways glad, because you reached a decision. I do wonder if she will hurt you again, given the history, and worry you are trying again due to a shame for having failed the first time and desiring a happy ending. I know you're a genuine guy, and marriage to you probably did mean life. I really hope you made the right decision and that you will not be hurt again. Best of luck, Mike.

Thinking of you, even if I'm not with you.

Rose

Thoughts?