Search Results: talking about bands with a girl

We only went on two dates, but so far:
- He never takes out his phone except to show me stuff when we're together.
- Asks some really personal things about family, hobbies, goals, life and even weather! It really seems like he's interested in getting to know me.
- He does most of the talking and asking questions.
- Wants me to meet his friends after the first date.
- Finds excuses to touch me, but they are really innocent (IE hands brushing or asking for hugs)
- Flirts but innocently, nothing remotely sexual.
- Never looks at other girls.
- Girls try to flirt with him a lot. I decided to test him and told him I'm going outside to finish my drink. He immediately stopped talking to the girl and went outside with me for 30 minutes waiting for me to finish drinking.
- Told me out of the blue he doesn't sleep around.
- When I was going on holiday, he asked in detail whether I will ever come back and he seemed worried. When I told him I will, he was relieved.
- I tested him again. I told him girls expect too much and everybody cheats on everyone. He told me if he is really into somebody, they should commit because trust is VERY important in a relationship.
- Added me on Facebook after first date.

But here are a few red flags:
- Can't post on his FB wall.
- Seems busy most of the time, working, band practice, etc.
- Has a lot of female friends and pictures with them.
- Friends with a stripper and liked a photo of her but.
- When he saw his friend he told me to stay while he went up to talk to him.
- Is a band player. C'mon, all of them cheat!

So is he a player?

I was at at bar watching my friends band play with some friends and my friends with benefits is one of the band members. After they played they just had music and karaoke and people were dancing, I know how to dance but I'm really shy so I usually don't and I guess I'm kind of awkward too but anyway, my girl friends went to go dance and they waved me over to join them. I was drunk and dancing is fun so I thought 'fuck it' and went and danced with them. We all danced pretty stereotypically, moving our hips and waists and such. I seen my friends with benefits watching me and I just thought he probably liked watching me move like that. Fast foward to a couple day later, I'm at his house, we just had sex and we are talking and he goes "I was watching you dance the other night and " then he just starts busting up laughing! I instantly feel embarrassed and self conscious and tell him "Damn I didn't know I was that bad" and he laughed and said "It wasn't bad" so I reply with "If it wasn't bad you wouldn't be laughing" and he says "No it's just " laughs some more "Watching you try to dance sexy like you were thinking 'okay I'll do this, that's sexy'" I just said "so I'm bad at it then, well I know how to dance just not like that. I've taken Jazz and Tap" For some reason I felt the need to mention I've taken dance classes to feel a little better. He just kept saying it wasn't bad but because he knows me so well, it was funny to see me dance like that. So do you think he thought I was a bad dancer? Or did he genuinely just think that me dancing was funny because of my personality?

Hey, if my question didn't make since I'll try to clarify a bit. As much as I myself am not a firm believer in the place formally known as the friend zone. I know people who do believe in it an as a result, experienced the pain of rejection because of it. Though, as I've learned some of those who've gone through it have become a bit bitter because of it. These people who I'm referring to are likely to take their anger out in passive aggressive ways.

For example one might say, "It's always the nice guys who get overlooked for the jerk who'll never love her. Oh well, she'll feel the same pain soon when he dumps her for another hot girl." There are many reasons why this statement is uncalled for, but I'll let you figure out why on your own. The point is, the individuals who make these comments or have these complaints are usually men. Now I'm not saying all men, so please don't beat me up to badly. Yet, they seem to be the most upset about the friend zone. Some will even band together in order to make themselves feel better by making funny quotes, memes, or just talking trash about the person they once liked.

Though, nothing makes bitter friend zoned guys stand together more than a female who claims to have experienced the friend zone. In the forum world of the friend zone any girl who utters the words, "I was put into the friend zone." Will suffer at the hands of an already toxic community. Now I wouldn't say it if I hadn't seen it happen in many forums myself. These girls get ripped to shreds if they claim the friend zone. They'll be cussed out, demonized, and their pain will be turned into an absolute joke. Because in the minds of these self proclaimed nice guys, females cannot be friend zoned even though anyone can be rejected. Let's be honest a guy labeling a girl as bro or dude is the same as a girl calling a guy her brother or good friend.

What do you think?
P. S. I think the friend zone is absolutely pointless.