Search Results: dirty comments

I was just wondering: How many of you in long term relationships (let's set the definition of LTR being at least 4 years) have done something or hidden something from your partner that you truly do not believe your spouse/SO would be able to get over.

It doesn't necessarily have to be something such as cheating on them, though that would certainly be a possibility, but I'm thinking something more sinister.. some dark secret from your past (ie: you were adopted at birth), perhaps even before you met them. Or maybe it's some family secret, either yours (ie: you were really your sister's child, not her younger sister) or theirs that you never told them.

I'll get this started by sharing something from my situation:

My husband and his mother always had a terribly rocky relationship. He never felt she really loved him and certainly not as much as the rest of her children. It was obvious to many people. Most wrote it off as them just being very different people. My husband was pretty wild before we married (ie: he had an affair with a married woman whose policeman husband dropped her and their son off at my husband's parent's house when he found out) and many thought his mother just couldn't get over some of the things he had done. He adored his father though and he was always his father's favorite of the 4 children. It always seemed as if his dad was trying to make up for how his mother treated him.

Now, here's the dirty little secret: I know the real story. My father in law was quite wild when he was young. He cheated on his wife for nearly a year, from just before she became pregnant with my husband, until a few months after he was born. His dad continued to cheat until his mother threatened to leave him and take their other children but NOT the new baby! She told me all this not long before she died. She always felt he was a reminder of what had gone on during that time of her life. His father begged forgiveness, which she gave him. He became a devoted husband and father and spent the next 50 years making it up to his wife. He absolutely doted on that woman! Now, while this information may help my husband understand his mother a bit more, it would kill him to know about his dad. I sometimes wish she had never told me this. I made the choice to never tell him. I'll never know if it's the right choice, but I believe it best to let sleeping dogs lie.

I'm not looking for advice because I made my decision, but I wondered if others' had similar situations and how you dealt with them. If you want to comment on my situation feel free to weigh in, but it won't change my mind. Thanks for taking the time to answer.

>Who made nasty Facebook statuses about me. | Not mentioning my name, but I would have to be dumb not to read between the lines.

>Who went behind my back and dated the guy she knew I liked not once but three times. what's ironic about this is that I met him through her.

>Who gave me advice to dump my ex, because he was :no good for me: Then when I actually do,messages my ex that I'm talking to another guy, even going so far as to link him to my Facebook wall post. -she did it because she was "pissed off"

>Who behind my back allowed my ex boyfriend to send her dirty messages without telling me. | This took place even before we broke up.| I find it funny because it was as if she liked it.

>Who without telling me why deleted me off of all her social networks, Yet kept my best friend whom she didn't know, and even putting a little comment about how it was my fault and that she's done with me. | I had my own personal issues going on at the time and I needed a little space.|

So in a nutshell I've known this girl for six years, we met as teens. We use to be so close and I've always thought of her as a younger sister. Everything between us was great until about two years ago when she flipped the script on me. It went from being soul sisters, to it being some competition to see who was better. It all happened to fast. She use to see me as a role model | Which I thought was cute at first, until she started doing everything I did. If I was on a diet, she would have to be on a diet, If I had a guyfriend she would have to find a guyfriend, and oh if she couldn't find one, she would make it obvious that she wasn't happy for me.

I'm just not sure anymore. Not to long ago she sent me a message saying that she wants to start over, but I'm not really sure I can do that. It's been six long years, but we have only been close for 3 of those years. Is this friendship worth a repair?

*Posting this question again because it went into another category*

A question that I saw on the internet a while ago and just would like to see what guys think about this. Of course, girls are allowed to comment on this as well.

If a woman forgives you for dirty deeds (cheating, nasty diseases, making babies with someone else, beating her ass, etc.) - not to say you have done any of that but rhetorically, would you have more respect for her or less?