Search Results: getting back together with an ex

Dear [. ],
For about the past month and a half, I’ve done a fair amount of reflection and thought. It took quite a bit of debate whether or not to send this letter at all. I’ve thought back to that time you said you look back fondly at the time we spent together and I’ve started doing the same. I miss that, but not only just a relationship I’ve missed you.

The time I spent dating you was some of the best times of my life. There will always be a soft spot for you in my heart. However, I realize that this isn’t a situation just about me. You have your own views and opinions. My intention is not to beg or guilt you into anything. If it does come off that way I apologize now. I’ve spent a lot of time apologizing though and I’m going to own whatever this becomes. I’m going to make you (for lack of a better word) a proposal. If you desire I’m open to taking time and seeing if there is still any spark per say between us. If there is still potential, or if that well has dried up. Either way, I feel we could both get a level of closure from that. You don’t owe me anything. Not even an answer. If you don’t desire to do that you can simply forget this letter. If you do though, you know how to contact me.

As I finish off this letter I still don’t know what exactly brought me to write it. There is really no logical reasoning behind its origins. All I have is my instincts telling me to write this. And a recent friend of mine said that you should always follow your instincts even though they’ll end up getting you in trouble from time to time.

You were dating and it was great for awhile but then it started falling apart. You tried but you couldn't fix it and the end was inevitable: you broke up. You went no contact and you were depressed for awhile, and then you started "getting over it." Next, you heard from your ex and they wanted to meet for dinner "just to say hi!" or maybe you texted your ex and they responded right away, you got the idea maybe they wanted to see you, and you suggested getting together.

So. . . what happens when you see your ex and you have that conversation, like:

I missed you.
I missed you too!

I really wasn't mad, I was just sad that it didn't work.
Me, too.

I've thought that we should have tried harder and maybe. . .
Yeah, me, too!

Do you think that if we tried it again. . .

You know where that leads. You end up in bed that night and you try to pick up where you left off. Sometimes it works but, usually, it doesn't. And we KNOW that it probably won't work but we still try, we still need to prove to ourselves that it won't work (and having that sexual partner back in your life for awhile is certainly a motivating factor.)

So how did reuniting with an ex work out for you?