Search Results: birth control

Hello, my relationship is about 2 years long with my boyfriend. At the beginning, he was lying to me a lot about important things along with doing suspicious stuff like giving another girl his jacket (he didn’t find that action in itself wrong, he viewed it as being a helpful friend), and romantic history. I didn’t know that he was lying then, and thought our relationship was going great even though I was a little more emotional during that time. He came clean because one of his friends told me 10 months in, and he apologized for his actions.

Not to sound narcissistic, but I have done a lot for him that he doesn’t appreciate. I have given him gifts and food, not expecting anything in return. I gave him oral and was waiting patiently until he was ready to do the same for me. I had a confrontation with him about not feeling appreciated enough in bed since I do what he wants and even got on birth control he wanted for him. He said he expresses his gratitude in other ways, but all I can respond to that is “how” since he doesn’t do anything outside of the bedroom as well besides hanging out and maybe food here or there.

I also haven’t been the best partner myself recently because I had to contact a male friend he hates to do some heavy lifting at my mom’s house. He was upset that I took that opportunity “away from him” whereas I’ve been asking him everyday on when he’d come but didn’t give me any response to that. He hates every male friend I have, and always makes me feel bad for wanting to hang out with them especially if I haven’t seen them in a while. Is it normal to feel like I haven’t been appreciated enough? He tells me he’s not good enough as well when I try to discuss things of this nature, and I’m tired of it. I’m not sure on what to do because every time I just want reassurance, he makes me feel bad for asking by playing the victim card and turn the tables so it can be about him.

MY OPINION:

I would say she has (or should have) most of the say in the abortion process, because she's more affected by the baby's existence. Her body is affected dramatically, her hormones, and then when she gives birth she has to take care of the baby and feed it from her own body. A lot of women die in childbirth as well, and if she's not in a good physical condition, she has even more reasons to abort because of the risk of death or health problems.

But, then the father is also affected by the baby's existence because he has to work harder and longer and has to provide for his family while the mom takes care of the kid.
But what if the man does not want the child? Let's say he does not want to take care of a child because they agreed on not having kids beforehand, and she suddenly fell pregnant because the birth control didn’t work. What happens then? What if she says she does want to have the child, and the man doesn't?

OR, what if she wants to abort the child and the man wants to keep it?

Who has the final say in any situation? I think there should be like a legal contract or agreement where each partner has to cite their reasons as to why they want to abort or keep the child, and then let someone (a professional) judge whether or not this should happen or not. For example, if a woman has medical reasons to abort the child and the man insists and wants the child, then maybe the woman would have the final say in this scenario. But if she wants to abort because she just doesn’t feel like having another kid, yet it's shown that the family is financially and emotionally able to take care of a baby, and he wants to keep it, then the man can have the final say here.

That's just my opinion. In an ideal world that's what would happen I think.