Search Results: being rejected because of looks

Years ago, I developed feelings for a friend. I let the romanticised thoughts of us having a relationship together build in my head to a point of obsession and eventually couldn't take it anymore. I told her my feelings; if only to get it off my chest.

She didn't feel the same but asked if we could still be friends. I agreed, though I was a little hurt at first and I fell into a depressive stint. Being rejected got me thinking: "I look for qualities I in a woman, but what can I possibly offer them?" At the time, I would have described myself as: depressed, tubby and no self esteem/ self confidence.

I joined a gym and started dieting. Lost a lot of weight and while I don't mean to brag, I finally feel confident due to my newly formed attractive body (less flab, more abs). I'm also a hell of a lot more motivated and out going than I once was. As for my friend, we would sometimes talk over the next couple of years; but only a few times. Nothing bad; we just didn't end up talking that much.

We recently started talking again and I noticed she seemed different around me than before. Eventually, she told me that she'd developed feelings for the "new me". (my words, not hers) and asked if I still felt the same? I told her I needed to think about it because... well... I'm not sure it's a good idea to date her...

On the one hand, I still have feelings for her and it would be a dream come true... But on the other hand, I spent years telling myself not to feed this obsession for her and to move on with my life; it was unhealthy and damaged our friendship. I've changed so much ( I think for the better) since I confided my feelings in her that I find myself asking if she's even really in love with me or my new sexy body and newly found confidence. Then again, isn't that why I made these changes: to seem more attractive to the opposite sex?

Do I give into my urges and have a relationship with her? Or do I continue to tell myself there's nothing there and we should both move on?

So, I've been working with a new girl and there was an instant chemistry as we are from the only 2 from same area, the rest are from a different part of the city.

Very quickly we found out we have the same mentality towards our work and when we work together we have fantastic results. We get on to the point that senior management believed something was going on outside of work and wanted us to stop working together as they didn't want us to mix work and private life. This is probably because in the office (which is open plan) we are always near each other and our banter is amazing, we are always laughing together, joking and communicating. Although this far nothing more than friendship is going on.

I have now and again caught her looking in my direction at me, and she now offers to drive me much closer to home so my journey is much simpler. She's also offered to pick me up, which I've declined. When we talk and it's just us (when she's dropping me home) she is always laughing and joking and she seems very happy in my company. One night she went out of her way as she was worried I might not get home, even though my train was due... She said she was worried something might happen to me.

She always initiates that we should work together and it's very evident she enjoys my company. Outside of work however we talk little, this is due to her having a very busy lifestyle which she does talk to me about when we're together but I try not to contact her too much as I don't wanna seem desperate or scare her away.

I really like her, however am unsure if she feels the same. Some of the signs are there that suggests she does, but I'm just unsure. I'd love to ask her out however don't want thinks to be awkward between us. I'd be okay with being rejected and remaining friends but don't know how she would take it.

Based on reading this, would you say there's something more than friendship? Should I ask her out?