Search Results: breaking news to a friend

After breaking up over and over my relationship is officially over. I know I gave her a hard time and thats mainly due to the fact of my Over thinking/Relationship Anxiety ( I think I have it ) . I've been in 7 relationships before which most of em ended with them cheating. Im not the type to fall in love. So, I believe she is my first love and its hard letting go.
She told me she wants to be just friends after everything. She says she's also in love but I dont see how if she's ok with being just friends. She says she plan on moving back to New York soon so thats part of the reason she's done. Then she would think I was playing with her feelings at times. I hate that she tells me she thinks about me as much as I think about her/ How her feelings are still there. Hearing her say these things makes me not want to give up with trying to get her back... On top of that I feel like she's my first love. She tells me she wants to be friends but doesn't want to see me with anyone else as stupid as that sounds she said. I told her I never wanted to love again ( well till im like 30 ) because im tired of let downs/ If this how heart breaks feel I dont want to chance having another one. Its hard talking to other females due to the fact things dont feel the same like I dont get the same excitement I once had before.. Almost like my feelings are gone. I think about her 24/7, I dont sleep good at night, and I dont have motivation to do anything. I start college in fall... So I already got enough stress from everything else around me.