Search Results: ask friend's boyfriend questions

You can go through my previous questions if you want to get a better sense of the situation, but here's the SparkNotes version:

I was talking with this girl that I reconnected with after college, for about a year. Due to a general lack of communication, and what I can only assume is some mental illness issue (yes, she has confirmed to me that she suffers from at least 2 mental illnesses), this girl and I shared a hot-cold something-more-than-a-friendship, that she has recently cut-off when I called her out on the general disregard that she had shown me. THIS WHOLE SITUATION JUST SEEMED SO OUT OF CHARACTER FROM THE WOMAN I REMEMBER!

Her ex boyfriend, while not in the picture, had stayed in touch with her for a while after their break up. They tried to do the whole "just friends" thing, and I assume that she was basically treating him as the significant man in her life. Apparently my former friend was under the impression that they might reconnect as a couple, but then never did, and he has since moved on and is dating someone new.

In hindsight, she really treated me like an after thought. I sort of justified her behavior by telling myself that she wasn't spending as much time connecting with me because of the greater emotional requirement than talking to her platonic friends, but now that she has publicly humiliated me by telling my friends to get me to leave her along and made it clear that we were never in any kind of a relationship (despite what I believed to be some pretty firm flirting); I am curious to know if any of this was real, or if she straight up played me, or maybe even if her mental illness is causing some wacky nonsense. We are long distance, and she's saying that my messages were scaring her.

You have to understand that this was really sudden and got really ugly.

I want to reach out to her ex, to ask if this kind of behavior is/was typical from her, or if I'm an isolated incident, but I don't know if that would be appropriate. What do y'all think?

So I matched with this girl on hinge app about a week ago. Always polite to her, not judging her, and would like to get to know her more. She’s 21 and very interesting. She lives at home and is an only child and has one friend that she’s on and off with. Her parents argue a lot as well. She’s really pretty though. She is not from this area and moved here in high school and got bullied and was an outcast. She’s pretty intelligent but doesn’t apply herself. I think she doesn’t like herself either. Has no faith in herself. She said she’s never had a boyfriend and doesn’t trust people right off the bat. Especially men. She’s not experienced with them but she also doesn’t give them the time of day either. She doesn’t give off friendly vibes either. Very distant vibes. Her texts are mainly her venting about her shitty friend (who is a girl) or her parents yelling at her about stupid shit. I live in the city and she lives in the suburbs. She isn’t allowed to drive to the city? And wants her friend to meet me and drive her -however her friend is on and off with her and keeps going in circles and the girl is annoyed and currently ignoring her friend. I have video called her the past two days and the first day she was somewhat talkative but hates showing her face, and shows the ceiling, yesterday I was trying to ask her questions about herself and she would say I don’t know or start nervously laughing and give short responses. I told her I was not available to hang out today, something came up (annoyed with her tbh), she sent me 6 text messages venting about her shitty day, how she put the girl on blast on social media and her parents etc. I didn’t respond to any. She also said she wasn’t sure if she wanted to be in a relationship and keeps misinterpreting my texts the wrong way. But she also keeps trying to contact me. I don’t know what to do? It’s like she wants to open up but something is preventing her. She’s weird