Search Results: Afraid to commit

This girl and I have been in somewhat of a relationship for 2 years. When we first met she was dating a married man (her first love) She seemed really into me and we had sex a few times. She didn't want to leave him and every time we had sex she would feel quilty for cheating on him. I was getting tired of her coming and leaving my life, so I meet another girl. We became friends and would hang out and talk about our relationship problems. Eventually we has sex and started to be a couple somewhat. At first she wasn't wanting a relationship because her last boyfriend was abusive. When she finally wanted to commit to a relationship I wasn't ready because the original girl keeps coming and going but I feel that she has commitment issues The second girl I was talking about was in a relationship from 15-23 so she has no problems being committed. The first girl had a relationship with the married guy for about 3 years but she cheated on him I think 4 Times. The married man is way older than her I am older as well but his is way older. I think he ruined her view on relationships. Basically she feels that sex is the only thing in a relationship now. I look at her like a victim. I think about her too much. I have found a great girl but my feelings for the first girl are a lot stronger than they are for the second girl. I really despise cheating and I don't want to be in a position where I would cheat on anyone. Its hard because my mind says go with the second one my heart says fight for the first one. The first one said the problem is that I live at home and don't have a driver's license. I have had some set backs because of drugs but I'm getting out of the hole. She is the reason I stopped using and made me realize I was lonely. When we talk she leads me to believe she wants a relatioship but then she's gone for a week then back for a week. So does she like me but afraid to commit ot is she just nuts?

I've been a good husband and have never cheated (emotionally or physically). I've always brought home the $$$ and treated my wife with appreciation and patience. I've taken care of myself and try to look the best i can.

This is a long one so Thank You in Advance for your help.

Here Goes:

1. I keep getting yelled at every 3 months over mistakes I've made in the past. I have admitted to the mistakes, apologize for them, and have never committed them again.

2. I keep bracing myself every 3 months for another verbal attack for mistakes I have admitted to, apologize for, and have never committed them again.

3. Wife is very critical of me. She critiques everything i do and often says "you aren't doing this right" and "you're being to slow".

4. Wife is not approachable. I'm afraid to get yelled at if i try to initiate something to talk about.

5. Wife always brings up my past sex partners because she knew them an didn't like them.

6. Withholds sex because of my sexual past.

7. Wife has never trusted anything I've said.