Search Results: hes made the initiative to talk to me

My bf recently cut off his female friend. He said it was bc he had a huge crush on her before we met (I knew about this) & was redeveloping serious feelings for her.

When he confessed his love to her before meeting me, she rejected him (I was never worried about her, it was clear she had zero feelings for him & she moved several states away months ago.

after she rejected him he started to move on from her, but she didn't believe him. He said when he met me he thought I was pretty & sweet, but he only pursued me so she'd stop thinking he still liked her. He didn't anticipate we'd become serious.

8 mos into our relationship he started falling for her again so cut her off. After cutting her off he told me that before we met he was very much in love w/ her. He talked about how he would've done anything for her, she made his life so happy & simple, etc. He brought her to meet his parents (thats a huge deal, I'm the only other girl who's met his parents). He showed me a pic he had of her hidden i bc it had sentimental value & he offered to shred it in front of me.

He told me once he ended their friendship it helped him fall in love w/ me even more. He said she has some qualities I'm lacking, & he told her- "its wrong to have such strong feelings for someone else while I have a gf." He told me she was a threat to our relationship, & she had "a weird effect" on him.

I'm so glad he was honest & took the initiative to cut her off bc he realized it was a problem...but I don't know. If he loves me like he says then how could he develop such strong feelings for another girl? Should I dump him?

It hurt so much to hear him speak so affectionately about her, to hear that she has what I don't, that he fell more in love w/ me once she was out of the picture, & that he asked me out just to prove that he's over her. What do u think? Any advice/opinions will help.

Pros:

-Loving

-Caring

-Wants to have a relationship with God

-Cares deeply for me

-Committed to me

-Left his family for me

-Made plans to marry me and take care of me

-We have history

-He is funny

-Makes me feel safe

-Protective

-Does a lot for me regarding buying me food or movie tickets

-We know each other very well

-He is open with me

-He respects me

-He takes care of me to the best of his ability

-Nice to me

-He makes me feel better when he is around

-Sometimes he comes to me and makes me feel better when I am down

-He is a very good shoulder to cry on

-He is good with kids and good at keeping them happy

-I have been with him for almost 2 years now (known him for 3)

-We are engaged and have been engaged for a few months now

-We have done many firsts together (but we have not had sex yet)

-he loves me for me

-I am deeply in love with him and have never cared about anyone more

Cons:

-can be very negative

-Religious (wants me to be a Lutheran- I don't mind, but he is chained to it and a slave to it)

-Can’t handle stress (recently he tried to kill himself because he had too much pressure)

-Needs help in what he does- dependent

-Doesn’t keep his word

-Suicidal

-Temper

-Manipulative

-No initiative

-Can be verbally abusive

-Can be tormenting and mean

-His attitude is based off of his circumstances

-Sometimes when I want him to come find me and make everything alright he doesn’t and I have to go find him to fix whatever is wrong

-He doesn’t do ‘out of his way’ nice gestures, like buying me flowers, etc. and he never did

-When I get upset about something not involving him he thinks I’m mad at him

-Talks the talk and doesn't walk the walk (or keep his word at times)

-the way he proposed to me was not gentlemanly. he purposefully made me angry all day long so that I wouldn't suspect anything, and he proposed to me while we were fighting

-his family does not accept me and slanders me, despite him leaving them he allows them to do so

and just to clear things up, these are the traits/actions of a SO. I described a male but it could be a female I guess.