Being distant after second date, what should I do?

A question for women but guys are more than welcome to give their input.

Went and got coffee with this woman and we exchanged contact information, after which we bumped into each other a few times and talked a bit. I told her we should meet up when she's back from a business trip. She said we'll arrange something, then called me asking if I wanted to meet up for drinks. I agreed, and it seemed to go well but she wasn't initiating any touch, even though I was which she was okay with. She made a comment about how the first kiss is the basis of the relationship but I felt that really forced the kiss (kind of like a guy asking if he can get a good night kiss - pretty much kills the vibe) so I called her out on it saying she'll have to wait and see.

We bumped into each other again a week later, and she was open to touch again (small of back, stomach, legs, etc.) but wasn't really initiating it, but she seemed to be having a good time and wanted to hang out for longer which made our hangout take up the better half of a day. At the end though she didn't attempt to even hug me (same with the first date and the coffee meet up) when she was leaving, so I took the initiative and hugged her and gave her a couple of pecks on the cheek.

Saw her again a few days later, and she was still hovering around me, leaving her co-worker to talk to me, but when I asked her if she wanted to go for a drink, she told me she was busy that week, so I said okay we can try again next week. I ended up being pretty busy and not seeing her for a week and a half at which point she would still hover around me but she was a bit more distant but she would still hover around me and initiate conversation. I shot her a text the next day and she replied a couple of days later telling me how sorry she was for replying so late and she's been busy and will be busy for a while but would like a rain check.

Ladies, should I assume she's losing interest given that she's blown me off twice?


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • Most women want the man to make the first move. I waited and waited for 5 dates for my now bf to make a move but he never did. I got tired of not knowing if he just wanted to be friends with me or something else because he never made a move. Finally I said what the heck I kissed him on the cheek and it prompted more affection from him.
    SO in my opinion I think she is/was waiting for you to make a move, a small move, dont come on too strong, thats a turn off and will make her think all you want is sex from her. So ask her out again, be positive and upbeat, and make this your chance to make some subtle moves on her. SHow her you are interested

    • Isn't it a bit needy/clingy to ask a third time? I left the ball in her court last time we spoke. She still hasn't contacted me despite the fact that she's available for other social outtings for our group, but not mine.

    • Show All
    • cool let me know!

    • Peace can you follow me so I can send a private message?

  • You're over thinking it. She interested, just busy, she hasn't blown you off, she's had legit reasons.
    Give it another go


What Guys Said 0

Be the first guy to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!