Search Results: am i too uptight

I'm too uptight, there's no denying that. I just want to find a way to cope/overcome it and want to know how you did it.

**PS - long post warning. (no duh!) You don't have to read through everything if you don't have time, even points one and 2, and couple of points at end, will give you enough of an idea ***

Some info to help give you an idea of what I mean:

- I'm very much a perfectionist, and if I don't think I can do something the proper way, I push it off and usually end up not doing it. (this is big! and furthermore, the real problem is, these things usually don't just disappear.)

- I can't make small talk - never could. I would feel uber-awkward if I was in a large group of people where I didn't know anyone, even if there were some things in common between us.

- if I don't want to do something, my immediate reaction is no; and then everything I do is to procrastinate on it and hope it goes away

- in case some psychologists are out there, both my parents are very Type A people - so they don't ever seem to relax much (or have trouble with small talk for that matter - they are actually very good!) . It's always work, work, plan, plan, work, etc. Time is a very important thing, and they would call me out if I'm not "punctual" or "wasting my time". It also doesn't help that I'm a procrastinator/tend to blow things off if I'm disinterested. Also, whenever we'd go anywhere, everything was planned to a T.

- my friends think I'm too uptight, so when it comes to having fun, I'm usually not person #1 on the list to go out with. Part of its due to my "non-small-talk" nature and also due to the lack of spontaneity (although the fact that I make some money now helps me argue "oh what the hell, just do it - its not like you are breaking the bank with this and it will appease them").

- on that note, I'm really "conservative" when it comes to money. I rarely eat out or spend on myself. if I'm making a big purchase, it usually takes me a lot of time to decide - and I tend to then make models in excel

- I guess if you read the last point, now you know I like thinking about things analytically. I made a pizza value calculator in excel that would tell me if a pizza deal is "worth it", enough said.

- I have seemingly 'unrealistic' standards about how you and other people should act, and how the social world should be. if you are curious as to what those standards are, it goes something like "there's an optimum way to do everything in this world, I want to try and do things that way" and the corollary "and others should try to be optimum too"

- I am too sensitive to criticism about me. I also tend to overreact when things do go wrong and conjure up so many "now what's going to happen" scenarios in my head.

what I want to know is: any solutions/tips/tricks?

i think even people empathizing their personal uptightness might help with finding common trends or finding one-off tips/tricks