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I want to like her. I used to, but then I shut myself down to protect my own feelings since I hurt myself and constantly embarrass myself since forever. Instead, they died, and I wonder if there is anyway I can reconnect and plug my emotions back in "real time"

In "real life" she's leaving on the 23rd of March, and I won't see her for 3 years! I think she's beautiful, and I felt aching and longing strongly for her not 2 months ago, but what happened to that emotion? I talked about her before on this website in the question as the "bombshell blonde" She's nothing short of amazing. I almost don't feel real knowing her, she's that good to be true. Since childhood I put girls with her personality on such a high pedestal, that I never realize that they themselves are normal girls, too, even human. However, there are prettier girls out there, and I know that, there's just no "her"s out there.

I should know my feelings, help me identify them. Love is such an abused word, but what is the real feeling? Is "parting such sweet sorrow"? Or is it healthy to not worry about her? I want to love again. I miss the innocent dreams, either of "damsel in distress" all tied up and I'm the hero she beams at, etc. Childhood had such magic, but now that I'm 22 and without a job, I have nothing to offer in the real world. I'm looking for work, I'm really trying, just not hard enough...She's a close friend, she moved here in 2005 in her freshman year in high school from Mesa, AZ. She's shy by nature, which I find attractive and she has a radiant smile.

So girls, how should men act if your going around the world doing service and that man has opportunities to write you letters-

what is okay to mention to her as far as my feelings go?

can I be her pen pal? How should I write, to make sure she writes back? Is it a good thing for a girl to know that she is missed and cared for? If so, to what extend does it become too desperate or annoying?

I want to miss her PROPERLY. It sounds weird but I feel she needs to know she's valued. You see, she thinks her best friend is prettier than her, but I think it's a tie (or at least the other girl is a not-so-close second to her)

On her service, I can be supportive through sending letters, but not romantic or presumptuous in any way. This leaves me with the question, "okay, here's how I feel about her, how much do I tell her?"

Sometimes my feeling sink deep and swell, other times, like right now as I'm typing this, I miss missing her, which means I don't, and I'm okay with her being gone, but I still want to have an objection inside me somewhere.

So your'e gone and he can write you-

Girls, what do boys do in this situation usually?

Okay, what could they do better?

I left some not-so-good impressions on her so far before she leaves in exactly 3 weeks from today 5/2, she leaves on 5/23 and won't be back until 2015!

I sure hope you guys on this webpage respond, and I hope I'm able to pull through with this.