Search Results: going to the funeral

Ok so this is my first job and I started it back in August. I’m a server. Full time. This place is super short staffed. It gets very aggravating and overwhelming how they want to do things outside of the job description because other people on our team are on leave or will be leaving. The girls are nice for the most part. There’s one guy that works part time. There’s a bunch of high school kids that come in for the PM shift. There’s 4 of us that work full time and 3 that work part time. The one girl whose my age that’s full time is leaving next month. Everyone else is older. She’s been there for 4 years and is like a manager. Hell sometimes she does manage the place. It’s too much and overwhelming. I suck at serving and mess up and try my best but it’s not up to my bosses standards. I’ve been arriving like 10-15 minutes late to work for the past 2 months and my boss reluctantly had to write me up. She didn’t want too but her supervisor was yelling at her. Anyways these college girls that are back and on break are being complete bitches to me and I don’t feel like fighting with them or dealing with them. I didn’t go to work today. I didn’t call or tell anybody I wasn’t gonna show up. I just didn’t show up. My manager called me 4 times and left a message saying “hey um your supposed to be here right now I’m not sure why you aren’t or if something happened or what’s going on um give me a call back or you know just show up thanks” that was at 11:25am and it’s now almost 1pm. They are short staffed today so they will probably be pissed on Monday and next Saturday I don’t wanna go in either because of who I’m scheduled to work with and how they want me to “manage” everyone and be a runner and server because the one girl isn’t gonna be there. I wanna call back and say there was a family emergency and I won’t be coming in and then say I can’t work on Saturday because I have to go to a funeral. Or maybe stay silent and let them be pissed off. I don't know

I was bored and I wanted to know if you guys have been to a funeral or wedding.
I've never gone to a funeral or a wedding. I had the chance to go to funerals, but I didn't go. I had no chances to go to any weddings.
I came up with this idea, as my friend is going to a wedding today, and I've never been to a wedding. I could've gone to 3 funerals, but I decided not to, as one of my friends told me, when she went to her uncles funeral, she had to kiss the corpse! and she was terrified, as it was freezing cold and stiff. Plus, I don't want to see a dead body of someone I knew.
Share some funny stories of when you guys went to a wedding (maybe even funny funeral moments?)