Search Results: rough country

In 2012 I met this great girl and we went out couple of times. I thought she liked me but I never made a move, since I was young , stupid and recovering from being cheated by my ex. didn't really trust women and just a thought of putting myself in a position where someone could hurt me again was terrifying. Not asking her out is something I regret very much.

But we stayed in contact and flirted a lot , but were never again in the same city, she helped me a lot during my depression. But 7 months ago her inconsistent responding started to irritate me and I was having a rough patch again and I did a stupid thing off blowing things out of proportion. I wanted her in my life, even just as a friend, but at times it seemed like a one way road and then something snapped in me, deciding , no more regrets! I admitted how I felt for her. And she told me she had a boyfriend and then I realised, I´m not her friend, I knew how relationships are important to her and she didn't tell me, I wasn't in her inner circle like she was in mine and that hurted and that conversation ended very ugly.

Today I´m great, I pulled all my shit together and I´m moving to a new city in a new country, fresh start, just what I need. But as my flight nears I can't stop thinking about this, I once let a bad thing from past influence me, I dont want it to happen again. I have this big need to end it well, to send her a text to thank her for helping me and that I´m sorry how it ended and explain why I behaved that way.

The only thing stoping me is;I dont want to wake ghost from the past. This would make ME feel better, but what impact would it have on her, is it selfish from me, to take it out off my system and out off nowhere just hit her with it?
I dont want to reconnect, I just... I just hate how it ended and she is and always will be very special to me, she helped me a lot with my fear regarding dating and getting cheated again.

So, should I do this or not?
thanks for reading I know it was a bit long

Hi, my ex girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me a week ago, a whole lot has happened the past few months and stuff got really complicated. Basically we live in different countries but visit each other regularly, we were engaged until she broke up with me back in April and that was really my fault, I got jealous and needed reassurances all the time and made a lot of accusations. (She did confess to lying about a lot in the earlier stages of our relationship). Anyway, things got rough after that and I started therapy to get rid of my "demons" and I heard nothing from her for 2 weeks. She contacted me one day as she was upset about something and we decided to try again. I paid for her to fly to Dublin (from the states) and I met her there from UK. The week was amazin apart from a huge fight over a text she got from a guy she apparently had no contact with. She left happy and we spent all our time on the phone together, then she dumped me again because my friends were accusing her of treating me bad etc. again I heard nothin until she sent my sis a message sayin she was pregnant and its mine. We started talkin again n things were goin really well, she kept tellin me how much she loves me and wants me etc. all was good until last week. We lost the baby and she started acting strange (understandably). She called me the night of the miscarriage and said she'd call me tomorrow, well I never heard from her again & instead she deleted everythin tht involved me and is on Facebook 24/7 (my friend is her friend on there). Our mutual friend thinks she is seein someone new but there's not much to suggest she is other than she suddenly disappeared from fb for 48 hrs recently (although she did spend a day on a boat with a new "friend". the reason she stopped talking to me was because I wouldn't tell her who I was going to London with when the reason I was going was to plan a surprise for her (London is her favourite place). Any idea what could be goin on? 10 days without contact now.