Search Results: signs he is losing interest

I've been with my man for a long time now and I'm getting pretty sick of strangers (and even friends and family) thinking that I'm in an abusive relationship... but what if they're right? This is what bugs me.
I've had people come up to me out of the blue and hand me pamphlets about domestic violence. They take one look at me and my man and think the worst. Sure, he's big and mean-looking but he's a good person 99% of the time. Only rarely does he behave any different to me.
He's never hit me, I want to make that clear right away. However, he has effectively isolated me from my friends and family (he hates almost everyone - even his own family) and that's supposed to be a sign of abuse.
Three years ago we were doing badly, fighting all the time, and I told him I was going to leave. He grabbed me by the collar and said, "You're crazy if you think you're going to walk out on me. I'll never let you do that." He then proceeded to tell me how he would make sure he'd have me declared an unfit mother and that I'd never see our kids again. His family has ties to the local police department (and they've suceeded in taking two of his sister's kids away from her) so I got scared and backed off even though I had every intention of leaving with my kids that same night.
Since then he has apologized and told me that he was just scared of losing me and the kids and didn't mean a word of it. I'm still pissed off about it but I've tried to let it go.
Now his friend has developed what my guy thinks is an 'inappropriate' interest in me and told me that if I ever screw around he'll kill his friend and... but he trailed off there.
I'm confused. I love my guy but the second he feels like our relationship is in danger he becomes unpredictable and frightening. I know this isn't normal but I don't know if it qualifies as abuse either.
Just curious to know what other people think. I've been abused before (physically, sexually and emotionally) and I don't know what's normal and what isn't.

Sorry for the repeat post, but I thought I could use more opinions.

My bf and I are sixteen. I'm concerned that he's losing interest because I'm injured, and he used to visit me about 3 times a week, and this week he only has twice. I asked him to come over once and he said he was sick and was helping out his parents with heavy-duty housework (which I thought was sketchy, since I didn't think you could do that with a stomach ache? But his parents are like drill sergeants and he's SUPER SUPER SUPER loyal to them and always doing work for them. He's very passive and always gives into them without argument. They've always been his number one priority, and their demands always cut into our dating time). He also said he was looking forward to his pizza dinner... would you still have an appetite for pizza with a stomach ache?

The next time I asked him over he agreed to come pretty quickly but left after about an hour and half since his parents needed his help again.

He was also less physically affectionate with me but I thought that might've been because my parents were around a lot of the time and he doesn't like to PDA in front of them.

Also, he still texts me constantly; we have conversations all day about our interests and he's always asking me about my life and opinions. He asks how I am and texts good night. But maybe he just feels bad for me since I'm injured? But he's always texted me that much in the four months we've been romantically involved, and our conversations go way beyond my injury.

We're abstinent due to his family's strict religious beliefs.

Am I being too paranoid? I don't want to call him out on it because I don't want to seem clingy. Thanks!