Search Results: abusive husbands

I am confused, i don't know what to do. I am 32, brother is 35. He is an alcoholic, narcissistic and emotionally unstable. He used to live with me but he got fired from his 7pm to 3am job because he kept on skipping work and getting drunk. He wakes up my entire family at 3am. He is verbally abusive and threatening to my 3 and 5 year old. He makes more work for me, more dishes and food to buy and cook. Contributes nothing financially, but always asking for money. 1000 here, 1000 there. I lost count how many 1000 i already gave him. He just gets angry and tells me, i need to give him a break. Poor him, he needs more money. He is homeless now and it's my fault. They're going to take his car away... its my fault. He has a bachelor's in web design but he doesn't want to work. He hates people too much.
My mom says to choose my brother over my husband and kids. Saying my brother is better and more loving and my kids and spouse don't love me, which is not true.
My brother is no longer talking to my parents or rest of my family because my parents wanted him to help clean his own dishes. Plus he was driving their car for free, living rent free so he left because they wanted him to act like an adult.
I am thinking of having my brother live with me again but i don't want to!!
Is my brother more important than my husband and kids? More important than me? And am i his slave?

Hi, I'd like to know what you'll think (especially the guys). Also, I'll leave out details for privacy.

At the beginning of this year I met this man (a client of mine) online. I'm a language teacher. I worked with him and got along great, I was living in Europe at the time and am still married and he is in America (where I'm originally from). After many complicated days I ended up telling him I was running away from Europe from abusive husband. Long story short, he helped me without me asking, literally saving my life and got me to America. We kept working together and met up in person twice, he was great.

Ever since then, we keep doing this:

- Whatsapp EVERY single day (not romantically tho), it feels as though we'd miss each other if we ever missed a day.. that's my feeling though. If I don't write first, he writes first
- Since he helped me I told him I would never charge him again, he still insists, but I think he's given up, we talk on the phone about 4 times/wk for around 1.5 hrs each time (not romantically, teaching, but we laugh tons)
- He is very generous, always offering help, checking in on me - we share lots in common (food, politics, books, humor, etc)
- He laughs everytime I do, even before telling him whatever I'm thinking about (I'm very giggly)
- we read each others' book recommendations and talk for hours about them.

About a month ago he was very nervous and told me some very personal things (he really doesn't open much about his private life). He has a girlfriend, hardly ever mentions her (has about 3 times, 2 out of those 3 were not good things and he kept telling me "I hope you'll still talk to me after I tell you this/I'm sure you'll want to forget about me..", he says he wants to stop his relationship but has failed, not sure why he even told me, but is making me wonder. We never flirt, I'm resisting, not sure if he's resisting as well. I'm sure his girlfriend doesn't know about me.
My family and I are forever grateful for what he did for me...