Search Results: relationship questions and answers

Do you think it's best if people make their own decisions, and keep their relationships private, or has the advice you've received helped you and your relationships?

In general, has venting been more of a positive or a negative?

Friends and family can be a sounding board, to listen and help you assess certain problems and issues that arise in your relationships. But they can be hugely influential. I have seen people give very strongly-worded advice, bad advice, and push the person/asker into doing something they might not have otherwise.

It's a difficult question to answer with just two choices, I know, because certain people are patient and therefore do give careful, well-thought-out, informed advice, while others have more of an impatient, smash and grab style to dishing out advice (i. e. they like to get on with it, and aren't around later to pick up the pieces, should their advice ultimately cause more problems.)

But I can't make the poll more elaborate, or it wouldn't be effective. So overall, is your takeaway that revealing secrets and very personal details about your relationships is okay/good/advice is good to get, or that it is quite often detrimental, because either the advice is bad, or that people you asked do not accept your decisions, become too invested, and tend to harbour resentment either to you, or your partner, refusing to be neutral with you or them, from that point on?

I'm sure there have been a lot of you on the receiving end of advice, or the partner of the person receiving advice, and suddenly your relationship is being impacted by people you barely know or have talked to.

I see a lot of people taking in what others think and say, and honestly, sometimes it makes me cringe. It's quite the power to wield.

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. He took me to dinner last night, and I finally asked him what drew him to me in particular. We met on Hinge. He said that there's three types of women: The easy ones, the difficult ones, and what he calls the 'worth it' ones. He said the easy ones have no standards or, if they do, they don't ever enforce them, which makes it easy to get in and get out. Then he said there's the ones that have a stick up their ass and think they're too good for anyone. He said I was one that would be considered 'worth it'. So my profile had a question on it that asked which was better: PS4 or Xbox One (Hint: It's PS4). He thought it was funny that I "gave" the answer but he said it was a unique question that women wouldn't ask. Then he said he saw I went to college, I was a teacher, I had pictures of my dog, and of my cakes that I decorated so he said I was down to Earth, too. He also liked that I was well spoken and close to my family. I had standards, too, but they weren't impossible to meet and none of them were based on money and stuff.

He said most guys think this way when looking for a woman. If a guy doesn't want a relationship, he wants an easy girl. If he wants to divide and conquer, they usually pursue the stuck up snobby one (consciously or subconsciously). But when they're ready for something good, they really want someone that's 'worth it'. Not easy to get, but also not impossible, and can be pretty reasonable contingent on personal interests, personality, and wants.