Search Results: making him get excited

I used to have some feelings for one of my best friends and he felt the same way, but I backed off. He had a girlfriend plus I didn't want to lose the friendship we had - those aren't the reasons why I backed off though. I thought it was, but I realize now that it was more or less because I was afraid that it was turning into something, and I got scared. I'm twenty and I've never been in a real relationship before (real=no boundaries + lasting longer than a year at least), and I got scared that we would actually work out (am I making sense to ya'll?). I guess things were progressing fast between us yet he had a girlfriend, and I felt like I didn't know what I was doing.

I eventually forced myself to give up, and I was successful. However, I've started to have feelings for him again after spending a whole day with him and his family/other friends on his college graduation day (he held an afterparty afterwards). That day, I learnt more about him and about his family, and I realized all I'd been missing out on. During the party, I found myself jealous when other girls would flirt with him and get all excited about our newly single mutual friend. By the end of the day, I realized I'd fallen for him again. I recently said goodbye to a man, so at that time I thought it might just be from the adrenaline from my heartbreak as well as from other things like family issues going on in my life right now - but I still feel the same, so I guess it's not the adrenaline.

That night, I couldn't sleep. A few nights later, I went crazy and told him through Skype (since I'd fled the country for summer break). We tried to arrange a time to meet in person before I left, but couldn't. The result? Bad. He froze for a second, then he told me he no longer has feelings for me and that he's not looking for a relationship right now because he just broke up with the girlfriend I mentioned at the beginning. I shouldn't have told him. Now, he feels awkward and we used to chat