Search Results: picking fights

My boyfriends main love language is acts of service. He wants me to cook, clean, take care of the dogs. Initially he wanted me to do the majority, but then lets split chores. He doesn’t acknowledge that I always keep everything stocked whether it is groceries, soap, toilet paper, his favorite drinks. He doesn’t acknowledge I take care of the dogs 3/4 of the time. He always complains he is picking up my mess, but the reality is we are about even. What I mean by that is I will leave my morning coffee in the sink and he gets upset that I didn’t put it in the dish washer, but then he will make a breakfast for himself &leave all of the dirty dishes. He usually loads the washer &I dry &fold it. He also washes clothes 3x more than I do. So if we have 3 loads maybe 10 things are mine. Last night I had a bad day at work. I made dinner &told him about the day. He was doing the laundry this time, but I wasn’t feeling helping out too much this evening. He got upset that I didn’t put up all the clothes even though I have always folded them and we had always put our own stuff away. I did the dishes and he got mad I missed a utensil. He frantically ran around and kept mouthing how some day it’s got to get better. I am not sure if all of this is normal for someone whose main love language is service. I understand I can always be better, but I had a hard day and I was contributing he was talking to me like I’m worthless then he slept on the couch and left this morning without a word. No matter the fights we get in he always kisses me in the morning. He didn’t take care of the dogs. I don’t always want to fight for what I have and haven’t done. I don’t want to keep a list and tally, but this is kind of strange to me. The crazy part is I found out he lied to me about cheating on his ex wife this weekend and he wanted to kiss me the next morning and I was really upset and he in return got upset so I feel like his standards for me are a little crazy based on his standards of himself.

I know a guy who’s dating an abusive woman for just over a year now - she controls him and beats him up and is jealous of every single female he’s around... she forces him to write things in chat rooms and fights him if he doesn’t... she’s also going around saying things which aren’t true like that they’re getting married - which they’re not as he has said... she has beaten him up and has gone as far as defaming him and blocking him and threatening him if she doesn’t do as he says... she beat him with a metal stick after he came home from a bar because she thought he was picking up girls and he went out while she was asleep, meanwhile she claimed to be ok with him driving her car...

is it possible for a guy to be forced into marriage with an abusive woman?
Is this type of a relationship dynamic normal or it it obvious that this relationship is troubled and doomed?