Search Results: being kissed slowly

Sorry this is so long! I will add a poll as well!

I have this problem where a lot of times my guy friends end up hitting on me and like wanna hook up. Its not anything where I am leading them on or that they are being jerks its normally that they are lonely and they think I'm attractive and good company so then they make a move but in reality they don't want a relationship they just don't realize it at the time and it has ruined two of my friendships so far.

Anyways I have been slowly becoming closer to one of my friends and right before summer we went out together and we dancing at this club where we ended up making out and then going back to my house and having some fun. We were both very drunk, it was actually very funny, but we decided the next morning that it shouldn't happen again. That was 3 weeks ago, we still talk all the time and hang out and it was fine. Then last night we went out together again and even though I wasn't really drunk he was and things started to get extremely flirty between us, we already have great dialogue together so playful flirting comes naturally. Anyways he was sleeping at my place with our other friends because they couldn't drive home, he wanted to sleep in my room with me but I told him that was a bad idea but we were still hanging in my room and then next thing I know we are making out. So I stopped it and told him he had to sleep downstairs. The next morning I came back from my test, I am taking summer classes, and was stressed out so he came up to my room to play with my hair so I could relax, we ended up falling asleep and then waking up an hour later and ended up making out again so again I stopped us and told him I had to go to work.

Anyways last night when he first kissed me I told him it was a bad idea because I didn't want to ruin our friendship and these things never work out and that the only time I would ever go further is if it was actually going to be a real relationship but we weren't there anyways.

We are not having sex I'm a long way ft from that. I've never been in a relationship so it's all new, but I notice he only ever touched me if we're kissing. He's affectionate then but only if kidding... Dues he need to be distracted bc he's Ashland to be affectionate? I don't mean sexually I mean affection physically.

Also if I touch him when we're not kidding he kind of freaks out. I'm not comfortable with affection so maybe he's getting a weird vibe, but I want it so I'm trying lightly subtly very slowly.


Dont tell me it's bc he is a guy and guys are not used to affection. I have not been lovingly touched by a single person since I can remember- partly bc I learned to reject it by being starved if it as a child- and I'm still aware that it's important. And I want it. And it's not that he doesn't do it just when he can ignore it it be distracted... I don't get it.

What can I do? It's really important to me like I'd say no point in a relationship without it but it's hard to talk about. I feel really awkward even knowing how much it matters to me. Lke it shouldn't but it does. I'm torn between working on it and feeling like I should just get over it and be detached.