Search Results: how a guy treats his mother

That's how my parents' marriage were like since the time I was a toddler all the way to my early-mid 20's. The physical altercation was always my father turning a heated verbal argument (yes my mother had her list of insults towards him but that's no excuse to get physical) into physical. It would off course ended up my mother crying. Yet, they're still together and my mother claims they now have a better understanding of each other and according to her there is still love even after all those horrible arguments and him getting physical on her. She partly blames herself for being the verbal instigator and that he was just retaliating in his way. No excuse in my view.

Now I'll be turning 30 on April of next year and this is definitely not the type of marriage neither my boyfriend nor I want to have. We think it's very abnormal to insult or get physical with someone you love, someone you choice to be the mother/father your child.

I don't believe in insulting a guy nor stressing the heck out of him but even so, that's also not an excuse for a boyfriend or husband to lay a hand on me ever (even worse if a child is a witness to all that). If so, I would be in my rights to press charges on him and it would end up in either a break up or divorce. I treat that the same as if cheating happened: it would be over right on that same day.

I'm not really the girl who falls for "bums". I work in a store. His mother works with me. I love his mother, she's amazing. He works in the back, we work in the front so I don't really see him a ton throughout the day. One day he was helping me bag on a SUPER busy day, and we started just kinda saying "Hey" to one another, and now he always comes up to the front and sits on a bench during his breaks, something I'd never seen him do before. And he ALWAYS says hi to me when he first see's me. He walks down ALL the registers the long way to see if I'm there to say hello. He does the same thing when he's saying good bye. On the rare times that I leave before HIM, I go to the back to his area and flit about until I find him, and then I just talk to him for a bit before I leave. He teases me a lot about dating. The other day he was mentioning how his car was broken and then was like "So if I get a date I'll have to show up on my bike and she can ride in the basket." and then was like "Well you could fit in a basket, you're so little." (because I'm tiny.)
I used to think that he only said bye to me because he was saying goodbye to his mother and I was like a pit stop, but today his mother didn't even work and he STILL went down the registers until he found mine and said bye. THE PROBLEM though, he's 7 YEARS older. Plus he's working retail and not in college or anything. He's genuinely a good guy though. He's expressed that he does want to go college but can't afford it, and I'm not in school, but he's expressed that he thinks I should go. Only he doesn't do it in a way that it's demeaning, it's like he GENUINELY wants better for me. And the other day he had asked me if his mother was at work yet, I asked why, he replied sincerely "I just wanna make sure she made it in alright." And, they say how a man treats his mother is an indication of how he'll treat you, and I've never seen him be anything but kind and pleasant to his mother.
I just don't know what to do?

When Maria was 19 she had sex with a 82 year old man and got pregnant. Maria decided to keep the baby boy and named him Marvin. Maria developed postpartum depression. She was very sad all the time when Marvin cried she wanted to bang her head against the wall. She boob fed Marvin, changed his diapers, tickled his stomach, kissed his forehead and called him muffin. Marvin was a very quiet, child. He smiled a few times a day, he was affectionate towards her but he was more quiet and gentle about it. Maria found being a mother depressing and boring. Then when Marvin was 1 years old his father died from a heart attack. Maria felt like a failure, she fell into a deep depression. She became numb. She couldn't feel anything at all but did everything she could to support Marvin and made sure he was safe, well fed and taken care of. When Marvin was 2 Maria started dating again.

She dated a man named Mike, She loved this man. And Marvin liked him too. But they got into a fight and broke up. Maria had sex with three different guys in the same month and got pregnant with a baby girl. Maria could never find the father. When she got back with Mike, she gave birth to the girl and named her Selena. Maria was happy and more confident with her daughter. Selena eventually becames her favorite child but she treats both of her kids equally. She tells Marvin that he's handsome, a muffin and sweet. She tells Selena that she's strong, awesome, a star and can do anything. Years later mike gets into a fight with Maria and leaves her. Maria cries and sobs. Marvin and Selena are heartbroken. Maria feels angry and glares at 8 year old Marvin. She calls Marvin a horrible child and spanks him until his butt is bight red. Marvin screams and cries. Maria becomes stricter towards the kids. She starts spanking Selena and forcing Marvin to be more social.

is Maria a bad mother?

Okay so this is because of an awkward situation.

So I REALLY like this guy from work. However I don't see him as much as you'd think, it's a big place, he works in another department. He treats me perfectly well, and if he's leaving before me, always makes sure to go out of his way to come and say good bye to me.

However the ISSUE, is that his MOTHER works in the same department as me. So it makes things pretty awkward in the flirting department if he comes down to see me and she happens to be near because there's no telling when we'll be working by each other or not. One time even he came down to flirt a bit, but didn't see her when he started. And so she pops out of NOWHERE and is like "BOY I SEE YOU FLIRTING!". She wasn't mad or anything, in fact she seemed to think it was rather funny. But I think she succeeded in embarassing him real well.

He left pretty quickly after that. But it's so awkward, should I keep trying to get with this guy even though I work so closely with what could possibly be my future mother in law?

I saw this on a Spanish soap opera:

A mother forbids her 10 year-old son to play with his female childhood friend Julia. Julia's mother had an affair with her friend's husband and the both died in husband's car.

The lady took her anger on Julia and even slapped her after her son disobeyed her, claiming the girl is just like her mother. For years the woman did every thing to ruin that girl's reputation.

10 years later (both of them now 20 year-olds in love), it's discovered the Julia's mother wasn't the mistress but rather her younger sister. On that fateful day she locked her sister in her room, went after the guy to stop them from having an affair, to stop the guy from abandoning his marriage... to stop them from leaving.

The lady finally apologizes to Julia for how she treated her all these years as well as for everything she said about her mother.

Personally, to me it makes no difference whether the mother was the mistress or not... the child is a different person. Even if the parents was the culprit, you still don't take your anger out on a child who had nothing to do with adult issues.