Search Results: afraid being in love

I have always dream of being a parent and raising my own kids.

However, recently... all I can think about is what type of parent I want to be. As an Asian, I grew up in a relatively strict household. I got scolded and beating but so far... I'm not sure if it has affected me as an adult.

I want to impact my kids positively... allowing them to grow up with freedom and confidence but also distinguishing what is wrong and right. Which method do you think is better?

I am only afraid that by being fierce (option A), it will make them feel insecure and rebellious or even growing up abusive and violent.

I follow approach B, it might not make such an impact and might raise them being complacent, thinking that by doing wrong... they might not be afraid of the consequence as I did not "punish" them enough. Or even growing up spoilt.

I want my kids to grow up being loved, having a lovely childhood and growing up well thought and groomed without emotional scars. Do you believe in caning or physical forms of punishment?

I just witnessed this:

Two guys are friends. They're in the same circles. Not best friends, but close. New girl enters.

All three people are above average in looks though their morality and sexually-driven motivations are pretty suspect. They're all sleeping around a lot.

Anyway, Guy #1, the bartender manager goes out with girl first. It doesn't last long. But they're really into each other. Coworkers talk. He's been sleeping with the staff. He's evasive and non-commital. He's ghosted, jumped around. Some girls warn the girl about him (although some of their motivation is jealousy, as well.) But she's an independent girl, and she doesn't like being told what to do. And, she thinks she is/wants to be special. She goes out with him anyway. They hit it off. Apparently more than with the others. After a short time he asks her, "You wanna be exclusive?" much to her surprise. She is happy. "Yes."

But before things really get going, another third party [helps her out?] by showing her a pic of him with another girl. On a date in a lunch place. She gets pissed. "I thought we were exclusive. You're already sneaking around on me?" "No, that was before. Before we decided. It's over now." But she doesn't believe him, breaks up. Then quickly changes her mind, asks to get back together. He: "No, I don't like the drama." He's also apparently upset about her not trusting him, and listening to outside influences.

Shortly after, she gets asked out by Guy #2, personal trainer. They also hit it off. She likes him "Even more. He's a man, not a boy." Trainer asks bartender friend, "Hey man, you ok with this... if I date her now?" He doesn't say much. He doesn't want it to happen but feels he can't intervene. Time goes by, and now and now guess who comes back? Bartender: "I just want to let you know that I care about you. I want you back." Huh? "I was scared." Of what? "Of falling in love, getting hurt."