Search Results: hate the thought of him being with anyone

I'm experiencing some sorrow and just overall "bleh" feeling with life.. End of April I met this guy.. Seriously have never been so stoked about anyone before. Everything to his name was lovely. He wasn't perfect of course but I just was soo enamored with him.

Things are fizzling between us. Mostly because he doesn't want commitment with anyone now and maybe I'm a bit inpatient, but I also know how I want to be treated. That said, I have to walk away from this... And it's really sad to me.. Bc of the what could have been thought. I'm not going to say goodbye to him, I'll just stop trying and I'm sure he won't come after me. It just sucks because I like him a lot and I was so excited about the thought of being in his life... It all felt too good to be true, and I guess it was bc now I haven't heard from him in a few days and it just feels like he lost interest. And then I see new girls following him on Instagram and him following back. I catch on to people's change of behavior easily and I don't know I'm just sad. Maybe I came on too strong, I don't know. I just was really down for the guy. Ugh this sucks. I hate dead ends with people :( mostly bc I know I'd give them my best.

I know I'm only 21, and this won't last too long before I dip back in the water... But seriously, the past 7 months I've really given this dating thing a go and it's all just been a shit show.
I have guys asking me out very frequently and I just decided hey, let's actually stop being an introverted loner and maybe you'll meet someone! Ha ha haaa..

seriously... I have never been such an emotional wreck in my life Hahahah. My god. I never thought dating would be this difficult, or how full of lies other people can be just to get what they want. Man! It's been a long go. I'm SO sick of it! I'm sick of not trusting any dude, how they "aren't ready for a relationship," ... Pushing me to behave in ways I normally never thought I would (stalking them at midnight, setting up fake online accounts to catch them). I swear I'm not psycho! But I hate hate hate being ignorant and being the dumb one. I won't have a guy pull me around like that. My god, and don't get me started on these "mind games." They work! They do work, but I hate being such a fake person to another.

all in all, I've ended up empty handed. I've learned great lessons about players and manipulations, but I am farther away from love and trust than I've ever been. My heart was really broken by one guy, who I spent way more time being dragged around than I should have allowed. I lost myself... I literally didn't sleep and i lost my dignity. Now, I just want to chill OUT and not see any guy or do anything except MY own thing.

normal experience? Anyone else?