Search Results: losing a friendship

This is the letter:
"hey
sooo, i paid the bill off! the weight has finally been lifted 🙌🏿
i understand that youve been moving on with your life and im sure itll be easier when there's not a obligational burden attached to your ex lol
with that being said, i think its a good idea for us to finally stop talking. i dont have to tell you how i feel bc I've been honest this whole time. but im sure that by now, you see what i mean. I've finally decided that instead of going through this cycle over and over again, i should leave.
i know too much. i feel too much. a friendship between us wouldn't make sense anyway. i guess i always knew that, even tho it was something i wanted, but i wanted it for all the wrong reasons. i wanted to have you around (but i didnt), i wanted to gain closure (but i didnt), and i wanted you to come back (but you didnt).
unfortunately i held on&accepted things with hopes that you would find that there was still something here.
altho its part of what hurt the most, im proud of you for sticking with your decision. that takes a lot of maturity&im sure it wasn't always easy. but, you did what you had to do to be happy and thats all i ever want for you.
I don't know how many times i wrote this same letter to you, then hit you up days later. I've been so afraid of losing you, but im (finally) understanding that i been lost you. but, just like when you wanted to break up with me but you kept talking about us going on a break, i guess i had to just keep doing this til i was sure.
anyway, i wish all you all the best, always, and i pray that youve found your happiness within you."
Im trying not to act on my immediate feelings while also disregarding some info his close friend gave me; which was basically that he's not with his rebound (but ex has told me that they were just having sex, never in a relationship)& "just know, he's getting his life together". What would you guys do?

We were best friends before and didn't want to have sex and have it ruin our friendship. I ended up moving in with him a few months ago so that he could help me get on my feet after losing my job and home. Since then, we've fallen hard for one another, he says (and I've said the same to him) he'd be devastated if I ended things and I agreed that it would be the same for me.

He's mentioned several times that if I find I need to move on now that I've gotten back on my feet that he won't hold it against me and that our friendship means more than anything to him. I've told him every time that I'm not going anywhere but he doesn't seem to believe me, no matter what I say or do. We always agree afterwards that its a non issue but then he says it again.

I've asked him to stop and have shed many tears and gotten upset over it, which leads to him getting upset and telling me that I'm only proving to him that he is going to push me away. I'm exasperated! I love him very much and have no thoughts whatsoever of ever leaving, he's the most amazing and compassionate man I've ever known and I can't imagine my life without him.