Search Results: thinking about cheating

In August, me and my bestie admitted to liking each other. He then told me he wanted a relationship with me and he loves me.
I’m a lesbian but since developing feelings for him, I don’t know what I am anymore. I’ve just got to the point of not wanting a label. I am who I am.
We’ve both slept with each other twice since admitting our feelings and we’ve also had massive arguments, as you can imagine.
Recently he’s all that’s crossing my mind, I’m thinking about him far too much. I keep showing people pictures of him and saying ‘how cute is he?’, that’s how bad I’m getting haha.
I have three reasons for not wanting a relationship with him: 1) I’ve never properly dated a man before (it’s scary). 2) what if I miss sleeping with girls and go out and cheat on him? It would be unintentional but I just know how much I prefer girls. 3) what if it ruins our friendship? I don’t want to lose my best friend.
I’ve told him all this and he said ‘I’ll give you permission to sleep with girls whenever you want. I won’t let it ruin our friendship, nothing will ruin it. We can take it slowly until you’re used to it’.
He always gives me reassurance but i just feel like that’s not enough. The thought of dating a man is really scary.
I’ve even deliberately invited him around my house today, telling him I want help decorating my room. When in reality, I just want to see him.
He’s suggested just an open relationship to me in the past and I told him no, it’s a bad idea. But with all these thoughts, I’m thinking maybe it isn’t a bad idea after all.
I’m going to tell him today but my problem is, is it a good idea?
I want more then friendship but I don’t want it to jeopardise it.
Please give your honest opinions!!

Long story short, my boyfriend has cheated in the past and we are working through it. (Been together 7 years, started dating in high school and now through college). I don’t have the passwords to any of his accounts, but his Twitter was still logged in on my phone (mine is usually logged in) and I got a notification about a suspicious login and when I clicked it automatically opened his. The details of the login aren’t relevant, but I noticed he had blocked some accounts where he hadn’t before. One of them being a girl he cheated on me with before we got back together 5 years ago. He would have had to have done this pretty recently.

My question is, why is he still searching up and blocking exes? I feel like I need to talk to him about this, as it really worries me considering how shady he has been acting lately. (Always has his phone on him, carries it to the bathroom, leaves the room a lot, isn’t present with me often anymore, weirdly hot and cold to an extreme - but I also read depressed men can show these signs too so I don’t know). Although the two could be unrelated, I’m unsure. Whenever I try to talk to him about most anything, he gets defensive and shuts down/doesn’t seem to listen. What should I do? Am I overreacting? What are your thoughts? Thanks in advance!

Long story short, my boyfriend has cheated in the past and we are working through it/he is earning my trust back. (We’ve been together 7 years, started dating in high school and now through college). I don’t have the passwords to any of his accounts, but his Twitter was still logged in on my phone (mine is usually logged in) and I got a notification on his side about a suspicious login and when I clicked it automatically opened. The details of the login aren’t relevant, but I noticed he had blocked some accounts where he hadn’t had any blocked before. One of them being a girl he cheated on me with before we got back together 5 years ago. He would have had to have done this pretty recently. My question is, why is he still searching up and blocking exes? I feel like I need to talk to him about this, as it really worries me considering how shady he has been acting lately. (Always has his phone on him, carries it to the bathroom, leaves the room a lot, isn’t present with me often anymore, weirdly hot and cold to an extreme - but I also read depressed men can show these signs too so I don’t know). Although the two could be unrelated, I’m unsure. Whenever I try to talk to him about most anything, he automatically gets defensive and shuts down and doesn’t seem to listen. What should I do? Am I overreacting? What are your thoughts? Thanks in advance.