Should I be worried about this?

[Mila0690]

So my boyfriend has been best friends (lets call her Anna) with a girl for a very long time. This girl is very pretty, has a few kids, etc. I am honestly not bothered if he has female friends but this particular one is making me uncomfortable, I have never met her but I don't like how they are with eachother, well I find the friendship a bit weird. In November, he told me Anna was messaging him telling him she was thinking of leaving her partner. Then during Christmas I moved in with my partner and this is when I started to think it was weird. Once I moved in, it was late at night about 10pm and he randomly says to me, that his sister fell out with Anna because apparently Anna left her partner because she liked someone else. My thought was why would Anna fall out with my partners sister when its nothing to do with them?

So I asked my boyfriend, did anna cheat on her ex or something? And he said he thinks so. Then that same night I noticed she was messaging my partner wishing Merry Xmass with lots of kisses etc, now the reason why thats an issue because my partner has spoken to me about male friends sending me 'kisses' etc in the past and he said how he never sends kisses to anyone else but me etc son why is it okay for his lady friend to do it to him but my males friends aren't?

The next night, after we had sex, we were talking about plastic surgery and he commented on how he liked my boobs then randomly said how Anna randomly is insecure about herself and she used to be a size A cup in bra and that she got a boob job and she's now a double DD and he said he thinks plastic surgery is disgusting. And he even said 'Anna looks pretty with lots of make up but looks very different without it'. He just liked a revealing photo of her on facebook as well. This is making me think he fancies her. When I send a photo of myself to my boyfriend, he often asks 'who else did you send that too'. So I am a bit suspicious of him now, do you think this is weird?

[SueShe]

I would indeed be worried about the entire situation.

A person that casually brings one specific topic up once in a blue moon is okay. However, when conversation starts to revolve around that specific person or she is constantly being brought up in talks and made reference of, then when there is more to it than what is apparent.

My feeling is that he has a crush on that person and that she actually mean more to him than what a casual friend should.

It is not normal for a guy in a relation to talk about the breasts of a female friend in such details and in such length.

I think it is time for you to have a serious face to face talk with your partner and to set the record straight.

[Mila0690]

I will do. Especially after moving in with him, and showing commitment to him

[zozo7880]

I would agree, he has some sort of feelings for her, even if he might not act on them you can tell its there to some degree. He may also be mentioning this stuff to you because he likes to see you a bit jealous. People are weird like that.

[bobalife]

Yeah that’s a bad sign... I’m sorry... sounds like your boyfriend is thinking of her more than just a friend... he was out of line and you should call him out. It’s not okay in a relationship to talk like that at all... even after sex which is like so intimate between you two yet he’s talking about another girl’s boobs? Wtf... it makes me mad for you 😂😅

[Mila0690]

I know see he's away at military training and back this week so I am waiting till he's home, honestly creeps me out

[bobalife]

It is creepy... and messed up. He’s also being a hypocrite about those emoji kisses... it’s not fair in a relationshipy if someone said you can’t do something or something to happened on your side while they have it happened to them with no problem. Gotta set your boundaries and get respect by your man. Like he needs to realize it’s not okay with what’s happening... and it’s gonna cause friction in the future :/ hopefully he would wanna talk it out and work it altogether... if he doesn’t, that’s a concern..

[bobalife]

Like for me in the past if guys hit on me or anything flirty, I would give my exes the respect by telling them ASAP.. so since he set that boundary on you early on.. he can’t even do that for you.. I don't know something to think about.

[Mila0690]

for sure, its so wrong!!

[MannMitAntworten]

You are over thinking this. He is sharing this about her because he is comfortable talking with you about this particular friend. Probably not something he gets to do with others. Meanwhile you are sabotaging yourself by assuming their is more to their friendship. From what you shared, not remotely. It is completely in your own head.

[Avicenna]

It is weird, but you have to worry about her throwing herself at him and also about her undermining you.

[Mila0690]

That is my biggest worry!!

[No10One]

I appreciate that you read this questions and try to be helpful.

[Anonymous]

i would not worry, since there are more ways a guy can screw up a relationship than a woman can

[Sia_nee]

Yeah sounds very weird and sus.