Search Results: girls changing minds

Background.

• From the very beginning of our dating experience I was very open about my trauma of abandonment of my parents and lies growing up as a child. "I have a vulnerability of trust. I have a hard time trusting people. I feel people I care for may betray me."
• Because of this I am not okay at all with flaky behavior or canceled dates.
• In the past I have almost broken up with her due to flaky behavior. For example inviting me over and then a minute later changing her mind. Etc.
• She has explained herself as being an off the cuff planner. She has stated that when she texts me invites she is "thinking out loud". She doesn't view statements like "Do you think you can come over Today/Friday/etc" as setting a "definite" date.
• On Monday morning, I leave her place and she says for the first time "Bye, I love you!"
• On Monday afternoon, she says she has a busy schedule but invites me over on Friday. But 30 seconds later pushed back saying that she didn't know about her schedule that day. I was annoyed and told me to discuss this Friday so she has a better sense of her schedule. I told her to get back to me on Wednesday because I am a busy guy and I don't set "maybe" dates.

The Story:

She emails me randomly on Wednesday a family zoom invite. The zoom invite is for Friday night. It was the night of our plan date at her place that was still in dispute and being discussed. She had forwarded an email from an aunt and it showed the emails of her mom, dad, brother, etc. When she forwarded the email she left NO message. There was no explanation. Nothing.

About 2 hours later she messaged me asking how I was, saying she missed me, etc. Then I asked her about the email and she says, "I totally forgot I organized.. a family zoom call on Friday!" She says she sent me the email "Just to show you that I'm busy.. I'm not inviting you to it. I was informing..."

Why no explanation for sending the email and "forgetting" she sent it?

So one of the girls I am dating was being a bit confusing. She said she was a sports fan but was too tired to watch a playoff football game. She wanted to do 2021 goal setting with me but forgot her diary and instead brought food to my place and cooked for me. All of it was no big deal. So I simply pointed out that she was confusing me by inviting me over and then a second later changing her mind. I knew she was tired because she had been posting online a bunch of work questions until 2am.

So I simply tell her its no big deal. I "just want you to be consistent" I told her. Because she was confusing.

So... she basically snaps and tells me to "stop being an asshole... I dont appreciate it. Stop being so critical of me."

Now... at this point I am starting to understand her ups and downs. So I just tell her that I am not going to fight with her and that I appreciated her coming to my place to cook for me. She just kept being bitchy and calling me an asshole for pointing out her contradictions.

I just told her, "I am not being an asshole. You seem very tired and need rest. I really like you. I appreciate you seeing me this weekend."

15 minutes later she texts me, "Stop being nice when I'm being mean. Goodnight."

I guess she did go to sleep because she didn't reply for a couple hours later. She was in a better mood. Back to her perky self. But I keep wondering if this was some type of shit test. Do women act bitchy on purpose to try to push my buttons and see how I would react.