Search Results: attracting girls with boyfriends

I occasionally see posts from girls complaining that their boyfriend has actually LOOKED at another girl. I am not defending the behavior illustrated above, but I think this is one of those Mars/Venus situations where the girlfriend usually attaches far too much importance to the occurrence.

Men are visual creatures. Even when we are in a committed relationship, a pretty girl attracts our attention. We can fantasize about what it would be like to have sex with someone other than our current girlfriend. That does NOT mean that we want to be unfaithful.

I live with my girlfriend and I hope that our relationship grows stronger for the rest of our lives. However, I still look at other women and appreciate their beauty, even younger women. . . BUT that does not mean that I want to pursue that other woman. I also have a girlfriend from my past - Oksana - who is very attractive and very nice; if our circumstances were different, I would be dating or living with her instead of my current girlfriend. I sometimes fantasize about having sex with Oksana. However, I have absolutely no contact with Oksana and I have no intentions of ever again contacting her. I must confess that I also fantasize about Kristen Bell but that's not gonna happen, either!

None of this behavior equates with infidelity. If your ability to maintain your relationship depends on your partner never looking at another pretty girl or handsome guy, your relationship is doomed. He may have turned to look at the cute waitress as she walked away, but he went home with you. . . right? Instead of complaining about something that seems to be innate and immutable, why not be grateful that your partner works to avoid temptation?

After all. . . haven't you - even just once - looked at someone else while you were in a relationship?

Ask guys what they understand about girls and relationships and most of them will eventually say that girls want their boyfriend to be their best friend. We understand that. You want your boyfriend to be closer than anyone else, to be your confidante, to be supportive and caring, to always be there for you. Yeah, we get that. And actually. . . many guys want the same thing in a girlfriend.

So, when your best male friend indicates that he is attracted to you, why do you automatically go to that instinctive, sub-cortical, knee jerk reaction: "But I don't want to take a chance on losing our friendship!" Do you know how lame that sounds to guys? Do you know how STUPID that sounds? And it actually makes some of us angry just to hear those lame words!

How often do you actually have a relationship in which your partner DOES become your best friend? If you feel some physical attraction to your male best friend, wouldn't that give you the best possibility of finding that boyfriend/best friend combination?

Or, is this "But I don't want to take a chance on losing our friendship!" line just a pathetic way of avoiding telling us that you aren't attracted and the idea of actually kissing us makes you want to vomit?