Search Results: good relationship with your boyfriend girlfriend

(I'm in college). I have a boyfriend, and it's a wonderful long term relationship (coming up on 3 years) and we get along great. We've never had a fight, respect each others' boundaries, but are supportive and talk at least once every single day of free will. We go on fun official dates all the time, even 3 years later. We were each others' first everything and have a huge amount of trust.

There's another guy I've known for 3 years longer than I've known my boyfriend and my boyfriend knows him too. We both liked each other at one point, but due to various circumstances, we never actually got around to dating. Instead, we've remained distant friends over the years. We chat occasionally on FB for instance, but that's about it. He also has a girlfriend now (few months).

As embarrassing as it is to admit, I still have some feelings for him. I usually have good self control, but one night two years ago, we were at my friends house and got a little drunk. My boyfriend wasn't there, because this was my friend's house, and it was more of just casually hanging out with 3 friends than a party. Nothing actually bad happened, but this guy gave me a back massage which felt really good. I said, "can I tell you a secret? I still secretly like you." He said, "I don't think your boyfriend would like that but I think you're pretty" and held my hand for a lot of the night. Then he said, you're an electron and I'm a positron (with the implication being that we were attracted to each other of course).

We haven't communicated at all in awhile, but in the last year, we've been chatting a little more on FB...maybe once every month or two. We both agreed that we'd have to hang out sometime this summer, but didn't know when Because of work/school. I really love my boyfriend, but (tbh) I've had a few pretty sexual dreams about this other guy in the last year (randomly). I know I still like him, but I know that the relationship wouldn't go anywhere...which is partly why I wasn't aggressive at all about dating him when I had the chance. Logic aside though, I'm still attracted to him.

I like being friends and talking to him, because he's had some great insights and really helped me out in the past. Would it be immoral to hang out with him by myself this summer (being fully aware that I like him)? Would it be necessary to drag my boyfriend to come along? He isn't great friends with this guy, so he probably wouldn't be all that interested in going. I wouldn't want to make him do anything he doesn't want to do, but I do want to catch up with this guy. Is that wrong?

I figure..we are friends and I'd like to maintain that. And, if my boyfriend and I did ever break up for some reason, he'd be the first person I'd want to date, so I sort of want to keep him in contact. That's an honest reason, but selfish :P I wouldn't mind if my boyfriend hung out with a girl like this, but maybe he would mind? I want the friendship, but is that a bit of a pretense?

What do you guys think?

Let's creative a scenario...

You are in a good relationship with your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse; there is trust, there is happiness, there may even be a ring in the future (if there isn't already).

A day comes in which you see someone; it is a person from your past that makes you momentarily stop. Perhaps it is your first love; perhaps it is the one soul you had always wished you'd spoken to; perhaps it is "The One That Got Away"; (or another equally special person, in whatever setting).

The reemergence of this individual causes you to look twice. Even though you love the relationship you are in, would the revelation of this person make you reconsider? Would it add a certain amount of strain, hesitance, or confusion to your current romance, now that you have been reminded, and s/he is no longer a shadow in history? Would you contemplate a rekindling?

Or could you move onward? After all, you love and are loyal to the person you're with; the past is the past. If you feel no revival, what /do/ you feel?

I am not in this situation, but I have often wondered about it.

Please include any other details/experience/thoughts you have on the matter, or creation of a similar scenario.